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When it comes to cheating, which is worse? adult content

Having feelings for someone else? Or f***ing someone else?

Because I have had feelings for men (only two) in the past but I never acted on them. My husband, however, has slept with one other person.

Thoughts?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:14 AM on Feb. 27, 2012 in Relationships

Answers (23)
  • acting on them
    staciandababy

    Answer by staciandababy at 3:50 AM on Feb. 27, 2012

  • I would be destroyed if I found out about either type of affair.
    An emotional affair can be a strong connection with another person, which is what you feel as you fall in love with a person.
    A physical affair could just be casual sex to the people doing it, or it could mean they are falling in love as well.
    Both situations are dangerous and toxic to a marriage.
    If you are both turning away from each other instead of trying to work things out, that's not a good sign.
    anyMouse70

    Answer by anyMouse70 at 4:03 AM on Feb. 27, 2012

  • There was a period when he woudn't speak to me. He was having trouble dealing with PTSD and I was having a hard time understanding that that's what was going on. I wanted my husband back, but he would brush me off or ignore me. So that's how the emotional affairs with other men started. He slept with someone else because my sex drive has gone way down. I'm not upset that he did it, though. I am more upset that he holds my actions of having feelings for another man accountable over his own accountability.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 4:15 AM on Feb. 27, 2012

  • I don't see how he thinks that what you did was worse than what he did? Doesn't make sense. You should be able to say "Ok, we both made mistakes, live and learn and move on" if that's what you both want to do. Good luck!
    anyMouse70

    Answer by anyMouse70 at 4:19 AM on Feb. 27, 2012

  • I think having sex with them would be worse, because u can't help what your feelings are, as long as you don't act on them. Or if u really don't love your hubby anymore and want to be with someone else, be honest and tell him first.
    sistersage

    Answer by sistersage at 5:34 AM on Feb. 27, 2012

  • Emotional and physical cheating are the same in my opinion. Anytime you go outside of your marriage for something you are suppose to be getting in your marriage you are damaging the trust and security of the relationship. If you are both willing to work on your marriage and want to try again you both need to forgive yourselves and each other for this to work.
    amandajoy21

    Answer by amandajoy21 at 5:34 AM on Feb. 27, 2012

  • Both are just as bad for different reasons.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 7:23 AM on Feb. 27, 2012

  • well... having feelings and having an emotional affair or just having feelings... ?
    figaro8895

    Answer by figaro8895 at 7:36 AM on Feb. 27, 2012

  • You mean in a committedrelationship or marriage?  Acting on the feelings/having an affair.  Is worse.

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 8:16 AM on Feb. 27, 2012

  • So you both made mistakes? You have forgiven him but he has not forgiven you? Even though he was more in the wrong then you were? Sound to me like you two need to go to counseling or divorce court.

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 8:20 AM on Feb. 27, 2012

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