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4 Bumps

My dh is a liar:(

Love my dh but he lies or has lied alot about money in the past.. Two of our cars have been repoed in the 10 yrs we have been married and both times he told me that he was making the car payments. So its been a year now that it thought things were getting better and NO MORE LIES. But i woke up this morning and our water was shut off. I was under the impression that our landlord covered our water portion of bills. This is what i have been told for the last year anyways.. I call my dh say whats up the the water is off. He hangs up says he is going to call the landlord..How many lies did he have to say to keep this one lie going? Makes me want to cry, Well i am crying it sucks to not know what my says is true or NOT. Well 10 min LATER he calls backs saying that he has LIED AGAIN. And we have been responsible for the water the entire time. And that he had thought we had an extention but i guess it didnt go through. He will got pay the bill now..WTF? I feel betrayed i know this sounds lame but for the last year i have thought our bills were xyz. When really they were xyz and the water bill. His reasoning behind this is that he DIDNT WANT me stressing about doing the laundry or taking my daily baths that i enjoy. This makes sense to me but he always lies to protect me when he is really hurting me in the end. VENTING and really sad today:(

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:02 PM on Feb. 27, 2012 in Relationships

Answers (20)
  • Sounds like he has some serious lying issues. Why would he need to lie about whose responsibility the water was? Have you guys tried counseling? My bet is it would help a lot.
    rhianna1708

    Answer by rhianna1708 at 3:05 PM on Feb. 27, 2012

  • Sounds like you need to take control of the many and give him. Spending allowance on payday. How did you not know though? That kind of stuff is written into your rental agreement.
    Mrs_Harsh

    Answer by Mrs_Harsh at 3:05 PM on Feb. 27, 2012

  • I really think this sort of lying is a compulsion; almost like a mental illness.

    Has he ever been through counseling or other therapies to get to the root of it?
    BrawnwynII

    Answer by BrawnwynII at 3:05 PM on Feb. 27, 2012

  • Looks like you either need to take over the physical payment of all the bills or leave him... good luck either way!!

    Crafty26

    Answer by Crafty26 at 3:06 PM on Feb. 27, 2012

  • Money*
    Mrs_Harsh

    Answer by Mrs_Harsh at 3:06 PM on Feb. 27, 2012

  • Take over all the bills and money,, does his pay go into direct deposit? Seems like he has a money problem.. time to take over!!
    NaiveDream

    Answer by NaiveDream at 3:06 PM on Feb. 27, 2012

  • Take control of everything that touches your life.
    meooma

    Answer by meooma at 3:07 PM on Feb. 27, 2012

  • I thought I heard the landlord say he needed a bill in his name and that is why he paied the water. Since he first started lying 5 yrs i have been sandbagging money aside.. Which is why i actually had 75 bucks to give him to pay for the water.. I do think this may be a compulsion. i feel like ive been cheated on.. Honestly SOUNDS NUTS IKNOW but i trust my dh would never cheat on me.. But be honest with a water i dont trust him for shit.. It is time for counseling im very embarrassed by this
    thanks for listening
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 3:08 PM on Feb. 27, 2012

  • i'm with Mrs_Harsh here... are you an adult? you live in the house too, you should take the responsibility to know what the bills are and how much they are. doesn't mean you have to control all the money, just keep yourself informed, ESPECIALLY knowing that he has lied and had money problems in the past... i'm sorry you're going through this but you need to either own up to the responsibility of knowing whats going on in your own house or put your dh on an allowance like Mrs_harsh suggested. :-/
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:08 PM on Feb. 27, 2012

  • He can't ;ie about money if he doesn't see any of it. YOU pay the bills. That way you know they are getting paid. I for one would never stay with a liar but that is just me.
    zoomomto3

    Answer by zoomomto3 at 3:09 PM on Feb. 27, 2012

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