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Another baby??

We have a 5 1/2 year old and a 5 month old, my husband and I agreed no more kids but I'd really like to have a boy. My husband told me not to get my tubes tied during the last delivery bc he was gonna do the surgery. 5 months later, nothing, and I'm concerned I might get pregnant again. I'm not on BC because every kind I have tried messes with my hormones which in turn messes with my migraines. I have talked to my husband about this many times but he just doesn't seem to care. He'll listen to me talk and then go about doing what he was doing. I don't want to end up pregnant and then he gets upset bc we didn't use protection. (??) I'm not really sure what to do. I know it's not healthy to have a baby right now but should I just keep my mouth shut and hope I do get pregnant again one day and possibly have a boy or do I convince my husband to take care of business like he said he would since he doesn't want any more kids?

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Asked by Anonymous at 10:44 AM on Jan. 20, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • No getting pregnant has to be agreed upon. Don't do that to your husband. That's not fair to him. He doesn't want anymore and that needs to be heard.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:47 AM on Jan. 20, 2009

  • Yikes. You two need to make a decision together and follow through on it. You could always remind him it's easier on men to be sterilzed via vasectomy than it is for women... If you get pregnant on the sly, you run the risk of a whole new set of problems. Talk about the feelings and issues behind each of your wants, like partners. Best of luck.

    Answer by figaro8895 at 11:03 AM on Jan. 20, 2009

  • You need to make the decision together about whether or not to have another baby. I would find a quiet moment and sit him down and tell him you need to figure this out. He either needs to get the vacectomy like he said he would, or understand that there's a risk of another baby. Or you need to come up with another method of bc. I think it would be wrong to just 'hope' to get pg again, knowing he has said he doesn't want anymore babies.

    Answer by mom2XandZ at 11:16 AM on Jan. 20, 2009

  • If he isn't willing to take care of the issue, then if a pregnancy occurs he is just as responsible. It shouldn't fall to you only. BUT if you are not 100% sure that you don't want to have more kids, I would wait on anything that is permanent. Go buy a box of condoms, at least this will give a little safeguard.

    Answer by luckysevenwow at 12:06 PM on Jan. 20, 2009

  • Thank you all for your comments. It helps put things into perspective. I would never intentionally get pg again. I was just saying that it could happen. I'm by no means ready to have one any time soon and I know I need to take care of myself some how. sometimes you just need to "hear" it from someone else.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:30 PM on Jan. 20, 2009

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