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How do you get your preschooler to not cry when you drop them off?

My daughter is in Preschool at the local elementary here on base, and she started back in September. But still, almost every morning she doesn't want to let me go when I drop her off. She will hold on to me and not let go, or if I try to walk out the door she will follow me out. She says she is scared every morning (but I know she has fun at school because she tells me every day). The school is on base, her brother goes to the same school she does, just not the same class, and her teachers are super nice. The kids in the class are very very hyper and alot of them get in trouble the whole time they are at school, so maybe it's the chaos? I don't know, all I know is she doesn't want me to leave. Anyone else dealing with this? What do you do?


Asked by AprilDJC at 12:22 PM on Jan. 20, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 20 (8,524 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (2)
  • Have you spoken to her teachers? You'll find that she probably stops crying within a few minutes (or less) of you leaving - this is normal behavior. A couple of things to try: 1. Read "The Kissing Hand" to her - it's highly recommended by teachers and parents alike. 2. Make sure that at home you have a routine set down for the morning so she always knows what to expect. 3. Ask questions about who she wants to see at school...get her to start thinking ahead and looking foward to the day. 4. Set rules for goodbyes (3 hugs...2 kisses...and then one more goodbye!). One rule I've set for my son is that if he isn't able to give me his goodbyes calmly, then we can't have goodbyes the next day. 5. Remind her that you'll see her later and that you love her. 6. Make sure she's getting enough physical time with you at home, too.

    Answer by JPsMommy605 at 3:47 PM on Jan. 20, 2009

  • Did she go to daycare or was she home with you? If your child was home or in a quieter preschool then this change really could be hard for her. My son is in Kindergarten now and still complains of the chaos and how loud it is. He's better and complains about who is misbehaving or who has bad manners. If it continues, have a parent teacher conference to see how she's doing. Could be she needs to stay back but that is the last resort. Could just be that you need to look her in the eye, tell her you'll pick her up at 3pm and that you love her and have to go. I'm told being firm is important. Sometimes the crying becomes habit because they get attention. Do you think she feels safe? Can you walk her to an activity in the classroom? I don't have a good answer but hang in there, it should improve.

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 3:12 PM on Jan. 20, 2009