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6 year old swears then lies about it.

He just started lying about 2 weeks ago. Last night he was at his mom's house (5 kids ages 13 to 1 and no structure) and was swearing back and forth with his 11 year old brother. When his dad found out, the 6 year old lied about it. Needless to say dad was furious!! How can we get him to stop lying and tell the truth...no matter how bad it is. I asked the 6 year old why he lied and he said he was scared he would get in trouble. This kid has never been spanked only time outs. He got grounded last night with no tv/video games for the next two days. Is this an appropriate punishment? (I am his dad's girlfriend)

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:27 PM on Jan. 20, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Answers (5)
  • Yes.. i would have started with that.. Dude is five and doing this, i hear ya mama im at my wittz end.. Nothing seems to work.. How on earth did our mothers do this?????
    HottMamaRossx2

    Answer by HottMamaRossx2 at 3:29 PM on Jan. 20, 2009

  • You might want to try rewarding his good behavior too. If you focus on the negative, the child will know only bad behavior gets attention. Make a chart for say every time he says something nice he gets a star. Then at the end of the week or 2 weeks he gets a special treat for getting say 20 stars or what ever number you chose. The Special treat might be one on one time with Dad, a movie or something the child really loves to do. Just remember that when punishing for bad language that you and the father need to set a good example by trying not to use it either. (Not saying that you do use it) Hope this helps!

    Fibro-Mom

    Answer by Fibro-Mom at 4:15 PM on Jan. 20, 2009

  • I always tell my kids that they will get in more trouble if they lie than if they tell the truth. I have even gone into the details of punishment. For example, they get into candy: "If you tell me the truth, you will miss dessert tonight for getting into the candy. If you lie to me, then you will miss dessert for getting into the candy and you will go to bed a half hour early for the lie." Usually, they would rather the punishment for the "bad deed" than to add to it for the lie.
    tropicalmama

    Answer by tropicalmama at 4:37 PM on Jan. 20, 2009

  • yes, it appropriate. i have friends who do soap or hot sauce. i have never had to resort to those things. just be sure he knows what words you object to. my cousin once said "I could have shit a brick" and when her mom told her not to say that word she said "sorry. i could have shit a rock."
    princezzmommie

    Answer by princezzmommie at 8:59 PM on Jan. 20, 2009

  • The rule in our house is "You do it, you get in trouble once. You do it and lie about it, you get in trouble twice." It's been fairly effective. What ever the punishment was going to be for just doing what ever it was is doubled. (One day of no TV ends up being 2 days of no TV if there's lying involved, for example.)
    I'd say your punishment is very appropriate.
    debra_benge

    Answer by debra_benge at 1:07 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

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