My husband is 22 and wants to get a vasectomy. We had a daughter before we got married (opps!) when we were both 19, and now that we are married we have another one on the way (which will be our honeymoon baby girl). I defintely don't want any more children any time soon, but he's adamant about only having two kiddos. I don't know if I 'm even sure I want that... I wouldn't mind trying for a boy.
He would like to have the operation after the baby is born, before he's 23. Does anyone think that's too young to decide to have such an operation? He said there's a chance it can be reversed, or we could adopt (He's adopted), if we chose to later. Do you think he should wait and get a little older before he decides something like this?
Asked by Anonymous at 5:08 PM on Jan. 20, 2009 in Relationships
Answer by JennRN09 at 5:10 PM on Jan. 20, 2009
Answer by ReneeK3 at 5:12 PM on Jan. 20, 2009
Honestly I would wait, you never know what you will decide to do later. My husband and I agreed not to do anything permanent when we got married , after 13 years together we changed our minds and it was the right decision but we took a year to make the final decision lots of talks. there are risk for him to consider as well as changing your mind later.
We were told reversal is expensive and rarely works. If I were in your position I would wait, your young and life can change over a period of years and you both may feel differently later. On the plus side most states require both a husband and wife's signature to perform the operation so you will both have to agree to it.
Answer by 3_ring_circus_ at 5:14 PM on Jan. 20, 2009
He may not want anymore children now but may change his mind in the future. I think most doctors require some sort of counseling before they perform the operation. I do understand how he feels you have two children and he is happy with what he now has. Nothing is wrong with adoption there are many children out there who are in need of loving homes. Maybe your husband wants to give back because he was adopted. Keep communication open, think of the pro's and cons and hopefully you can come to a decision together.
Answer by mommiedear at 5:16 PM on Jan. 20, 2009
Answer by mom2twobabes at 5:20 PM on Jan. 20, 2009
Answer by Anonymous at 5:41 PM on Jan. 20, 2009
Answer by Freela at 5:56 PM on Jan. 20, 2009
Answer by mom2XandZ at 5:57 PM on Jan. 20, 2009
Answer by LovinMyMikayla at 7:11 PM on Jan. 20, 2009
Answer by admckenzie at 7:13 PM on Jan. 20, 2009
Next question overall
(Babies (0-12 months))
the maual says no ,but social worker says yes...who do I believe?