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why doesnt he want to get married?

Ok so I have been with SO for over 2 yrs. I had a 3mo son when we got together and we have had 2 daughters sence. I bring it up and he just laughs he wont take it seriously. He said things like "why would I want to do that" and "ha, yeah right". Why doesnt he want to marry me?

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Asked by Anonymous at 12:44 AM on Jan. 21, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (17)
  • Stop asking. Do your own thing and be happy that he is honest. Believe me, you do not want to be married to a guy that is not really for marriage. You will regret what you are asking for. You deserve better than that. You can't force a guy to be a husband. He won't be a good one if you do and you will be miserable.

    Answer by hopelessnance at 12:49 AM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • Because he doesn't think he needs to. He's got you already.

    If marriage is important to you, give him a deadline. "We are going to be married by x date or we're through."

    Answer by gdiamante at 12:52 AM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • I am ok KINDA with it. its just EVERYONE keeps asking when we are going to get married and I dont know what to tell them. ANd I dont pester him I just would like to talk about it seriously and know that one day it is a possiblity,

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:52 AM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • gdiamante
    He will say fine then we are through. He doesnt care. He wont atand to be TOLD what to do and he will think that is what i am doing

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:54 AM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • I meant to write not "ready" to be married, earlier. If you are ok with not being married right now, don't pressure him and forget about what everyone else is saying! You can be happy without marriage. You may get married later on. But enjoy each other if things are working now for you. It's okay. Success will shut everyone up.

    Answer by hopelessnance at 12:56 AM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • Why do you want to marry someone that doesn't want to marry you?

    Answer by Trisha3 at 12:57 AM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • Why would he marry you? He's already got what he wants. You've given it all up for free AND you take care of his kids!

    Answer by jacobsmom707 at 12:58 AM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • jacobsmom707
    that was just uncalled for!! you dont have to be rude. My sister had 3 kids before she got married too. Some of us just are affaid to or just dont want to. I was married to my sona father and he became abusive so I am terrified that if it is set in stone then it will happen again even though I KNOW he would NEVER hurt me. I still cant help but have those thoughts.

    And I WAS ok but I am starting to really want to everyone around me is getting married and they have been together longer and and dont have any kids.

    Oh and they ARE MY KIDS TOO why wouldnt I take care of them?

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:03 AM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • i agree with gdiamante. why buy the milk when you can get the milk for free. if it's not that important to you then don't pressure him but you would eventually want to be married right? then you might want to get more of an answer from him like would this ever be an option or is it just right now you feel this way. ever since i read he is just not that into i have to say it myself. he doesn't find your the marrying type although you have a world of marriage material right? then why can't he go all the way if he has gone to the extent of having babies etc with you. let me just tell you that with my husband he knew at first sight he was marrying me. he knew i was the one without even talking with me.

    Answer by melody77 at 1:07 AM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • if he doesn't know by now a deadline won't make a difference. it just sucks cause you have given him so much and in the end he could just one day walk out on you and the family without you being able to claim any real recourse for your time. unless of course it's a common law state. being married gives you financial values that you as a wife would be entitled too. some people don't care about that but i would rather have a ring on my finger then just say i'm his live in whatever he calls you. also i agree with jacobsmom707. thats why men don't marry. women give them the option of not having to have too. make sense?

    Answer by melody77 at 1:08 AM on Jan. 21, 2009

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