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what do you do when you and your husband have nothing to say anymore?

ive been married 14 months and we have a 20 month old daughter. i stay home with her, and he does work study and is a full time college student. we are both concerened about how far apart we have drifted. at the end of the day,or even during the day on his days off, we cant come up with anything interesting to talk about. we love each other very much but never seem to have anything to say to one another. how do we keep our marriage going if we never bond anymore? any ideas would be very helpful. most days he just hides in the room and plays on the computer cause he says it keeps his mind occupied. i just dont know what to do anymore....

 
TARA26

Asked by TARA26 at 11:33 AM on Jan. 21, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (7)
  • yes I agree with these moms.. its just how they are wired... Get there mind thinking about sex with you and intimacy will follow. After you two get down and dirty he will more than likely open up about maybe some stressfull things hes been dealing with. Dont know why but thats just how they are! And having a child IS stress added to anew marriage I can completely relate to this.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:18 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • Just know seasons come and season's go...write a love note here and there, make love lots and write one thing down each day that you are grateful for in relationship to him.
    SFerber

    Answer by SFerber at 11:36 AM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • trying having a romantic dinner, or suprise him with sexy lingire. spice things up. i know it's hard with a little one around but me and my SO take one night each week and let our daughter go to grandmas house for the night and we have a "mommy&daddy" night. it's helped out releationship so much. i think it's really important to have one on one time with your SO. hopefully this helped :)
    sarrrr13

    Answer by sarrrr13 at 11:42 AM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • SInce you stay home with your child maybe you can take a college course online, one that he has already taken so you will have something to talk about. Maybe get involved in the game he plays. My husband and I have our computers side by side, to have something non-baby related in common we spend a little time together at night playing games together. It may sound silly, but it's fun, relaxing, and gives us more to talk about.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:46 AM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • Sounds like the spice in your life is gone along with the conversation. Surprise him with something you have nothing done before. Men LOVE sex do something that will definently get his attention. Plan a night alone and show him a side of you he's never seen before. That will definently strike up some conversation and alot more smiles from across the table.
    faithsMoM27

    Answer by faithsMoM27 at 11:52 AM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • Get out with other moms during the day. Ask how is day is going. Send him naughty text messages. Parade around in skimpy lingerie/ clothing. (in the house of course...) Never ever nag. Have dinner ready in the evening. You don't have to talk. Men connect better with sex anyway. If that starts going well, the relationship will come back too. This IS possible. Draw toward him in the way that men respond too and he WILL respond. After a little bit of this, he will start giving back, provided you married a decent guy. You are his wife, he loves you.
    kemclaughlin

    Answer by kemclaughlin at 11:54 AM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • My DH went through this. I just ignored him and started hanging out with friends more. That got his attention to where he found things for us to do as a family and from there we all bonded. It used to be where I would try to conversate with him and it went no where so I would get dress and leave and wouldn't come back until 10 0r 11 in the night.
    MrsTGray

    Answer by MrsTGray at 11:58 AM on Jan. 21, 2009

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