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How can I help someone like this

my brother passed away almost 9mons ago and his gf is still greiving horribly. What passages can I read to her or say that can comfort her?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:44 PM on Jan. 21, 2009 in Religion & Beliefs

Answers (13)
  • Anon 4:02 - What the hell lady?!?! She came here for help... That's not help!

    OP - I would suggest she find some help. Everyone processes loss differently and it just might take her a little longer than others. She should try to focus her emotions elseware. When she starts to feel down about things, she should go for a run or turn on the music and dance it out. There are also "grief" groups all over, maybe she should look in to one of those... As for passages, I'm the wrong one to ask... I haven't ever found much comfort in the bible...
    SabrinaMBowen

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 4:08 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • One of my favorite passages for comfort in times like this is Philippians 4:7 And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
    Apr1l

    Answer by Apr1l at 4:13 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • I have no passages. These are things that a few well spoken words cant fix.
    My best advice is to have her join a group for those who have lost loved ones and/or talk to a counselor.
    Maybe even write in a journal and get her feelings out. Talking helps a ton.

    My hubby lost his mother almost 11 yrs ago and he still grieves horribly especially at certain times of the year or when he sees certain things on tv that remind him. Give her time.
    BonesDragonDew

    Answer by BonesDragonDew at 4:27 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • It takes time. Some of us are far more sensitive than others when it comes to death and loss. There is a reason ppl wore black in mourning for a year. I'd give her that year then see if she's ready to move from that stage of grief to the next and find healing.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 4:30 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • She said her sadness is turning into anger?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:33 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • We have removed at least one answer from this question. Moms are looking for responses from other members that address the question they have asked. Please don't post judgmental or rude answers. They're not appreciated and will be removed by the CafeMom Team.

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    CafeMom Admin

    Answer by CafeMom Admin at 4:46 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • I don't have a passage, but when I was still a christian, and my grandmother passed away, my mom spoke these words to me, "I know it's hard to loose someone so close to you, but God didn't take her away to punish us, he took them away because he felt she was exceptionally special, and wanted to reward her for all the good she has done here on Earth. She would not want you to grieve for she is in a better place, she would want you to rejoice, that she has moved on and being rewarded for all that she has done." I hope that helps.. I know it made me feel better when I was a kid.
    xxhazeldovexx

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 6:10 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • there is a christian based book called "GOOD GRIEF" that has some stuff like that in it--my pastor handed it out at our church--hope that helps
    jdmyangel

    Answer by jdmyangel at 6:33 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • Like the above post suggests, I would research a good book that deals biblically with loss. I have not read a book on that topic but I have seen several in the Christian book store. God bless you both, I'm so sorry for your loss.
    deedee3849

    Answer by deedee3849 at 7:25 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • Talk to her about her anger. Help her to understand, God does not take people as a "punishment" to anyone. It was their time. He does everything for a reason and we should not dwell on the why's and how's. Help her to realize, she needs to continue living her life, for the chance of meeting her bf again in Heaven. He does not give us more then we can bear. There is a time for everything. My mother when she lost her husband (my father) got angry at the Lord to, until she realized he was in a better place.
    She can get through anything, with God's help. So she needs to stay close to him and give all her worries, burdens and cares to him.
    ItalianMomma04

    Answer by ItalianMomma04 at 9:18 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

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