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Why do men.....

feel the need to lie? I just found something out about my hubby's past, and asked him about it out of curiosity. Well, he totally denied it, even though I had actual proof. Why are men so stupid at times????

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:56 PM on Jan. 21, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • Good job on asking in a good way!! If if's doesn't bother you, I say just let it go. God knows what the truth is. Your DH knows weither or not he is telling you the truth. Hopefully his will come back with the truth, if he told you a lie.
    2kidsonly2arms

    Answer by 2kidsonly2arms at 4:07 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • they hope you are bluffing
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 4:01 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • I can say with all honesty that it's not just men. I use to lie about my past to my husband. He would get upset whenever things about my past came up. So to avoid confrentation over something I can't change....I would lie.

    Maybe that is what he's doing? Trying to avoid you getting upset over something that can't be changed. Ask him about it, in a non-confrontational way. You might be surprised at the answer.
    2kidsonly2arms

    Answer by 2kidsonly2arms at 4:01 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • I asked him in a very non-confrontational way about it. It's not something that bothers me at all. It was prior to my even knowing him. I was just being my usual curious self, and he got all defensive about it and said "Whatever you think happened, didn't happen.) It was just odd. Makes me wonder if he is ever honest with me.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:05 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • It isn't a man trait. It sounds as if he is either ashamed of it or aggravated about it. Perhaps someone else gave him a hard time about it and he reacted to you with memories of that other time. I agree with you that I'd feel uneasy, but try to put it in a back drawer and move on with life.
    Bmat

    Answer by Bmat at 4:12 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • He should know that eventually everything will come out. Has he done anything in the past to betray you? Are there trust issues? Us women are a lot smarter then men like to give us credit for, and we are great at finding even the smallest things out about our men when we really want to. If he really cares about you, then he will never feel the need to lie to you, especially about things in his past before he met you. How can that really affect you? If anything, by knowing each oher's past, you will learn more about each other.
    Dark_Princess_2

    Answer by Dark_Princess_2 at 4:13 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • It basically had to do with an ex of his that lived almost 3 hours from him. He stayed in a hotel and said that she didn't stay there with him. I just kinda laughed and said "Sure she didn't", in a totally joking tone of voice. That's when he got all defensive and claimed that yes he had gone to see her and spend time with her, but that no she really didn't spend the night with him. I just don't feel that he's being honest, and it's such a silly thing to lie about.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:16 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • He is proably ashamed, & not ready to admit something he most likely has not thought about in a LONG time. Let him know that there is no need for him to lie to you because you really don't give a rats behind what happened before y'all met. You just want to know that the man you love CAN be honest. Why even bother though? If it happened before you met, you shouldn't even think about it. He does have a right to his privacy, & if it happened before you, then it's really non of your business.
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 4:43 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • Even with the proof, do you know what really happened in his past. And since it is his past and you weren't in it, you really should leave it alone because it has nothing to do with you and like sumarai said, its really not your business unless he wants to talk to you about it. You may have proof that something happened, but do you know the actual facts about it?
    Kat122

    Answer by Kat122 at 4:47 PM on Jan. 21, 2009