Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Ok, am I wrong?

My husband is the only one working right now, he doesnt want me to go back to work b/c he rather have me stay home with our daughter. So I do, I enjoy itfor the most part, but at the same time my hubby wont let me go anywhere unless its like to the store.I pretty much have to wait for him to get home to do anything, and then we dont do ANYTHING, ever. Not even on weekends. His parents are hateful to me, so I stay away from them. My parents live in anotherstate, I lost all my friends b/c he drove them away b/c he says they are too wild. Im not allowed to go anywhere. I NEVER spend any money. But while hes at work at night, he goes out with these 2 guys and eats out all the time at bars, he once told me that they were going to a strip club and I got furious! Im not even aloud to talk to a guy that I have known since I was little. Im mad.he never takes me out to eat but he goes out with his buddies, am I wrong?

Answer Question
 
laurenparent

Asked by laurenparent at 8:45 PM on Jan. 21, 2009 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (21)
  • it's your life, you're the one that chooses what you do or don't do. You're letting him tell you no and keeping you inside.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:46 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • No, it seems a form of abuse, isolating you from others and keeping you mostly a prisoner, from what you described. Talk with a marriage counselor or minister or with a government agency that deals with abused women.
    Bmat

    Answer by Bmat at 8:48 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • Leave
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:53 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • i agree with bmat
    youngmm

    Answer by youngmm at 8:56 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • Does it really seem that bad??? I must have a blind fold over my eyes...I guess I thought this was normal??
    laurenparent

    Answer by laurenparent at 9:00 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • I agree with Bmat too. What would he do if you did just go out and do something? He has no right to tell you that you have to stay home all the time like that. You are definately not wrong in feeling that way. Good luck to you.
    mom2XandZ

    Answer by mom2XandZ at 9:01 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • It's not normal. You should be able to have friends, go where you want when you want. My husband encourages me to find friends, to go out and do other things.
    mom2XandZ

    Answer by mom2XandZ at 9:02 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • Give him an ULTIMATUM! You don't deserve to be treated the way you are being treated right now. I'm sorry for what you are going through. It's a tough situation but you have to be strong and let him know that it hurts you and tears you apart the way he CONTROLS and treats you. It's WRONG for you to just do nothing and be miserable. Act and be heard hon.
    Mommy_G70

    Answer by Mommy_G70 at 9:02 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • no but your wrong to stay. i would leave him. go back home with your parents he'll either get the picture or you will. your letting him control you. i would do what the hell i wanted and i would talk to anyone i wanted. let him get bad. it's not fair. there should be no double standard.
    melody77

    Answer by melody77 at 9:05 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

  • If you seriously thought it was normal you wouldn't be mad. And no, it's not normal to isolate your spouse at home while you go out to eat with friends etc. My hubby doesn't go out without me, and it's not because I'm a psycho wife who doesn't trust him, it's because he wants me there with him. Some women are okay with the strip joint.. I'm not. I seldom leave my kids with my hubby to go much further than a convenience store but that's my choice, not because he tells me I can't go. He needs to let you have some you time if you need it. I find myself in the bathroom or the kitchen sitting and reading or something to just be by myself sometimes. Send him out with the kid/s sometime alone and he'll get it maybe.
    lisa_ann_p

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 9:05 PM on Jan. 21, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN