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i dont know what to do anymore

ive been trygint o potty train my 4 year old for 2 years!!!!! he still will not pooop in the pootty today i got so fucking frustrated i kicked a hole in my wall i ahve taken away toys he cant drink juice or coco. he cant have any candy snacks nothing fun and he still shits his pants i have ran out of ideas he cant go to school untill he poops in the potty and i ahve no help with this when he goes over to my moms she give shim whatever he is now not allowed over thier. i am out of ideas i feel like a am not doing my job as a mother and i really just want to give my kids up for adoptioon i am soooooooooooo frustrated with this I NEED ADVICE

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 2:13 PM on Jan. 22, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (7)
  • Make HIM clean up his mess!!! ~~ Maybe if he has to touch it, he will stop???

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:16 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • The only thing I found to work was to back off and let him do it at his own pace.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:25 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • i dont touch that shit he dose clean it still nothing

    Answer by millitarymomof2 at 2:50 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • Wow.. Just a thought... He's 4, not 14. He doesn't understand the connection between having his toys and juice taken away because he poops in his pants. Mama, calm down and BREATHE! The only way you are going to train him is with positive reinforcement. Start a sticker chart and be consistent. Every time he poops in the potty give him a sticker and when he collects 3 stickers let him earn an ice cream or piece of candy. Lots of hugs and understanding is needed when he has an accident. Please understand that he is probably just as frustrated as you are. Good luck

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:45 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • Wow, mom you've got to calm down. I know its stressful, honestly I do. Your going to have a stressed out kiddo that feels like a failure. He isn't doing it to make you mad. Somethings going on. Have you spoken with his pediatrician? He may have some problems that aren't being addressed physically. I can't stress enough that you have to give him positive reinforcement. Praise him like crazy when he pees in the potty and if he doesn't brush it off and say maybe next time. My son is 9 and he still wets the bed but he doesn't do it on purpose. Its no big deal, we change his sheets and start again. Your not a bad mom! Just letting the stress get to you.

    Answer by mrsrevjohnson at 6:12 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • I was going through the same thing trying to potty train my oldest i found out that because of a bout with constipation that he had gone through it made him afraid to poop in the potty he thought it would hurt-so i told him dump it in the potty when he went in his pants and tell him see that? thats where u put ur poop not in ur pants! here- next thing i knew- he went (on his own) and sat on the toilet and pooped- when i saw it i gave him a big hug and kiss and told him see? thats the right way and gave him a treat and he never made a mistake again- another thing u can try is recruit another kid maybe a cousin or friends child who already goes potty to hang around for a few days- the only way i got my second son potty trained is because of my oldest showing him

    good luck! and have a shot of something strong- take a deep breath and you can do this!

    Answer by lovelyli217 at 6:57 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • Sorry you are getting SO frustrated! We were having a horrible time getting my 3 yr old potty trained. Turns out he had encopresis! He couldn't feel when he needed to poop! He has been put on a laxative to help with this and within 6 months his bowel healed and he was potty trained. Check with your ped to make sure there are no physical issues. One of the things that our gastroentronologist told us was to take him after each meal to try to poop as that is when the bowel is most active. That worked well for us

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:23 AM on Jan. 24, 2009

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