Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

I am bisexual and I don't know how to tell my family or my soon to be ex boyfriend ( I am in love with another girl)... best way to tell them??

It really scares me... and the thing is... This isn't a voluntary feeling. Most people think that it's something someone can help but I really can't. I love a woman. I am in love with her and I can't help it. I would be straight if I could. I try to forget her and to love him but... I look at him and there is nothing there anymore. I think it came from my childhood. I had a terrible father which made me tend to find comfort from the same sex. The world saw him as perfect but I knew that he was a bad guy, he hurt my mom and was so mean to me and my brother! But still everyone thought he was perfect. I told myself ( I was a kid ) If thats perfect then thats not what I want. I just can't love a man no matter how hard I try. I can have sex with a man.. and it feels right...but it also feels right with a woman, even more right. OMG. Idk what to do or how to tell anyone!

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 2:20 PM on Jan. 22, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (11)
  • i kissed a girl and i liked it...the taste of her cherry chapstick...i hope my boyfriend don't mind it... just come out and say it, the longer you sit on it and think about it the harder its going to be to do it. easier said than done but its like a band-aid. rip it off!!!

    Answer by chagenue at 2:24 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • i should add its your life who the f@#k cares what your family thinks. if you love her then you do, you certainly don't have to justify yourself!

    Answer by chagenue at 2:25 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • im bi as well..well i havnt got with a girl since i found my bf. just kind ees into it..just kinda bring it up as ur talkting to ur mom//dad or who ever

    Answer by HAUTMAMMA3908 at 2:41 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • Well are you bi or a lesbian? You say that you can't love a man...period. So that makes me think you are more a lesbian then bi. Are you only wanting to be with a woman? Just tell them...if your family really loves you unconditionally like they should they will accept it.


    Answer by Navymama at 3:01 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • Well... I still like men. I just never get past the liking part... So maybe I am Lesbian. Thanks for your answers!

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:10 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • if you separate love and sex you are just bi.

    Just come out and tell them. they may freak but who cares? you're an adult.

    Answer by chyna_doll at 3:59 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • Your family will get over it-eventually and if they don't what are you going to do? Nothing. If you don't have an issue with it, they shouldn't. I don't think you have to use terms like bi or lesbian when talking to your family, I would just tell them you have met someone else that you care for and want to try to be happy with. They will ask who and then just tell them HER name. I just feel that if you don't make such a big thing of it, maybe they won't and maybe it will be easier.

    Answer by stephgood1 at 4:09 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • When I moved in with my ex girlfriend 18 years ago, I never announced it to anyone in my family. She just showed up in my life and lived with me in the same bedroom. When we went on trips to my parents' house, we'd share the bedroom but I never made any sort of announcement. They eventually figured it out and treated her the same as if she was my husband. We even had a child together. Ironically, we broke up a few years ago because I realized I wasn't bi or lesbian (realized that a year into the relationship but stayed cuz of the child) and I left her to be with men. Don't want to go back to women ever. Had enough.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:36 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • Anon 3:36...How did you have a child with a woman? Wasn't aware that was possible....


    Answer by Navymama at 6:09 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • She probably adopted a child with her.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:19 PM on Jan. 29, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.