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Not wanting anyone to touch my newborn

I am a single soon to be new Mom. I have gone through my pregnancy alone. I now find myself very apprehensive about anyone holding my newborn. I don't want anyone around me or the baby after the birth. Is this normal? Has anyone had similar feelings?

 
Morenci

Asked by Morenci at 4:58 PM on Jan. 22, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

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Answers (11)
  • Please ignore the first answer. Thats totally bullshit.

    If you feel like you want to be alone the first days or weeks with your baby, then your family and friends should respect this wish.

    But you also need to know that they (friends/family) probably cant wait to see your baby. And thats normal too.

    I dont know why you feel like that, but there is nothing wrong with it. You want to be alone with your child, thats ok. Thats what you want. Real friends will accept it.

    Try to see it from their point of view though.

    Maybe think about inviting friends and family over for only 30minutes. So they can see you and the baby are alright, and then make them leave.

    you are not selfish, but i think it wouldnt be very fair for the family :-/

    i wish you all the best
    m.robertson811

    Answer by m.robertson811 at 5:07 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • that sounds a bit selfish if you ask me. I dont think many people feel this way. If it was a germ thing i would understand but even then they make hand sanitizer along with the fact you can wash your hands. Your feels will probably change when baby is born and you have visitors you will be glad to know people truly care.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:01 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • YOU GO MOMMA. IF THEY DIDNT WANT TO BE THERE BEFORE YOU HAD THE BABY THEN THEY CAN FORGET ABOUT BEING THERE AFTER YOU HAVE THE BABY. IM SPITEFUL LIKE THAT. BUT REGARDLESS, ITS NOT GONNA BE EASY RAISING A BABY BY YOURSELF. ITS SO MUCH HARDER THAN YOU CAN IMAGINE. BUT ITS SO WORTH IT. YOU WILL LEARN ALOT FROM YOUR CHILD AND YOU BOTH WILL BE FINE.
    SThompson21

    Answer by SThompson21 at 5:02 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • YA KNOW WHAT-PEOPLE SHOULD HAVE CARED BEFORE YOU HAD THE BABY. BEING PREGNATE IS NOT EASY. EVERYONE LOVES A BABY AND WANTS TO HOLD AND LOVE THE BABY THEY GONNA WALK AWAY WHEN YOUR BABY IS NO LONGER A BABY
    SThompson21

    Answer by SThompson21 at 5:03 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • Yes at first you really don't like to be away from your child but it will soon pass because you will eventually need time 4 yourself otherwise you will go crazy. Just make sure if anyone does want to hold your child after he/she is born make sure there hands are clean.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:04 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • Totally normal. I got really nervous anytime anyone touched my baby when she was really really new. I kept a bottle of hand sanitizer on me at all times.

    Now she's almost a month old, and I don't hesitate to hand her off to family members. Of course I won't let strangers come near her no matter what, but I'm slowly becoming more comfortable with my family touching her :D
    caitxrawks

    Answer by caitxrawks at 5:07 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • I was the same way when I had my first, even though I was married at the time. I just really don't like people being around my children. And his mom was a lunatic which didn't help at all. I let my family and friends watch my kids now, but don't like to take them shopping with me because complete strangers feel like they have the right to talk to and/ or touch my kids. So not ok.
    peppermintmocha

    Answer by peppermintmocha at 5:08 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • i don't think it is selfish or anything of that sort. it is being a good mother!!! i never wanted anyone to hold my 1st child at all, it scared me, the what if something happens and all. even at that i really didn't have a true cause of why i didn't want anyone to hold her i just didn't and if they didn't like it then so be, she was mine and that was final. so you do what you think is right and what you feel is right don't worry what they think.(it isn't their baby)!
    setliff

    Answer by setliff at 5:09 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • If your fam does want to see your baby then they need to atleast help you by bringing you food so you don't have to worry bout cooking or by asking you if you need anything b4 they come over.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:10 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • I'm 6 months pregnant with my first, and having the same apprehension. I have problems petting my dog, let alone holding my baby. My friends and family have all had the same feelings, and you don't have to let anyone near or hold the baby if you don't want to. It's been in you for 9 months, and you want to get to know him/her. I'm sure at some point it may pass, but if not, it's your child to be selfish with.
    matobe

    Answer by matobe at 5:13 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

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