• In the Spotlight:
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Toddlers thoughing tantrums

I have a three year old and he is always thoughing a tantrum what can I do to help he get over these fits and how to stop me from going insane. HELP!!!

Answer Question
 
mommyofthree939

Asked by mommyofthree939 at 7:33 PM on Jan. 22, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • tune him out or go to another room. dont give in to what he wants and dont give him attention positive or negative
    SThompson21

    Answer by SThompson21 at 7:34 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • Pay him no attention in the tantrum, if ou do thing like if you be good mommy will...if you stop mommy will.... he will learn he can get his way by acting this way, dont look at him or speak to him at all when he is having a tantrum or he will see it as when I do this mommy looks,listens etc...
    Personal story my DD was 3 and we where leaving k-mart in the mall and she got mad becuse I would not buy her something and threw herself on the floor kicking and screaming..you know what I did, NOTHING, I kept on walking, once she looked up and saw I was not there she ran the 20 feet to me and never did it again,
    midnightmoma

    Answer by midnightmoma at 8:12 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • Please don't ignore a tantrum in a child this young - he is still learning how to express his emotions and he needs your help to learn how to vent appropriately. Do you teach him to use his words? Reflect back to him that you UNDERSTAND he's upset or frustrated? He needs to learn alternative behavior for handling the strong emotions - he needs your help to work through them. Give him pillows to hit, or jumping outside when he's mad, hitting his bed, stomping his feet...help him learn HOW to calm down by breathing. Put him in his room until he calms down, then talk through his behavior, why he had a tantrum, what he can do next time to make a better choice when he's upset. Tantrums are emotional explosions and children need to learn how to handle them, not suppress them.
    JPsMommy605

    Answer by JPsMommy605 at 9:58 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • my daughter use to have major tantrums, I actually took her to her pediatrician for help. (this was my first child) I was told to tell her that she needs to use her words and not behave like that. Then walk away and not feed into her drama. I did this a few times and her tantrums stopped!

    mommiedear

    Answer by mommiedear at 10:43 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • I did both ignoring and trying to help them use their words. I said, "I understand you're mad" to validate his feelings if it warranted it. I did also turn him toward pillows to hit too and it actually worked. They do need to work out their anger but sometimes I feel you just have to ignore many of the tantrums.
    jeanclaudia

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 11:43 PM on Jan. 22, 2009

  • Ignore the bad behavior, reward the good. Mine screamed for 5 min straight at the top of his lungs and as son as he finished, I asked if he was done. I tell him how he should ask for things.
    Don't assume that they know the correct way to ask for things, model it for them until it become a habit. CHildren only do what they get away with-so don't let him/her get away with it.
    ConnorsMommy521

    Answer by ConnorsMommy521 at 12:03 AM on Jan. 23, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.