Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

I found out my husband cheated on me last month, but he still wont admit it

My hubby of 4 mo. took out a $1000 loan so he'd have money when he goes home on leave before he deploys next month. Friday night he went out with friends & didn’t come home till Saturday afternoon. When he pulled in the driveway I went out & asked him where the hell he'd been. He told the person he was on his cell with he'd call them back, hung up, & told me he got too drunk with his buddies to come home last night. Fine, whatever... Well later while he was taking a shower he got a text from some chick. Seeing that, I went thru his phone & saw he'd sent her a message saying "sorry you had to hear my ex bitching at me." I didn’t say anything to him about it & we both went about our business for the day. I got online to look at the checking accounts & saw that he had spent the entire $1000 loan the night before, including a hotel charge of $230. So no wonder he didn't come home....he was out fucking his girlfriend.

What do I do?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 7:16 PM on Jul. 19, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • Talk to a lawyer. Too bad you couldn't send a copy of that text to your phone. It could be used for evidence. Decide on if it is worth staying with him and if not, talk to a lawyer, before you get in too deep

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:20 PM on Jul. 19, 2008

  • Yeah, it sounds like he cheated on you. Will your response to his cheating be different if he admits to it at some point? Let him know what you know & what you want to do about it. If he tries to lie some more there is no point in trying to fix things (if that is what you want anyway). If you want to work on it & so does he you can go from there. No point in waiting for him to decide he feels bad enough to confess, who knows if that will happen?

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:22 PM on Jul. 19, 2008

  • I would leave him just for throwing away that much money, whether he screwed some other chick or not.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:23 PM on Jul. 19, 2008

  • Why don't you confront him about it? I would tell him I knew and make him confess. You've only been married 4 months and he's cheating? I'd try to get an annulment if I could.

    Answer by ReneeK3 at 7:31 PM on Jul. 19, 2008

  • Renting a room doesn't necessarily mean he cheated on you. He could have rented it to drink and party with his friends to look like a big shot. He could have met a girl there and talked with her. I can't imagine him getting an expensive room just for a quick romp in the sack with a female. he would have picked a cheaper motel for a fling! He was trying to impress someone but I don't get the feeling it was her.

    Answer by admckenzie at 7:38 PM on Jul. 19, 2008

  • I'd be ticked if I saw a message on my husband's phone to dsome girl about me being his "ex". He'd be in the DOGHOUSE, lol!

    Answer by ReneeK3 at 7:59 PM on Jul. 19, 2008

  • Please get rid of him now! My ex did the same thing to me for about 3 years. EVERYTIME I believed him. UGH! Don't waste your precious time with him. Let him do whatever he's going to, and you find happiness with someone who deserves you! It's not easy, or fun, but worth it in the end. Best of luck to you:)

    Answer by mama14572 at 11:02 PM on Jul. 19, 2008

  • He cheated on you, and by not owning up and telling you what happened, then he is also lying. Leave, divorce him and take him for all he's got.

    Answer by taracv at 5:04 AM on Jul. 20, 2008

  • My husband is in the Air Force and we (as well as everyone we know in the service) expect our men to have a higher standard then to stoop low enough to cheat. Leave him. He's not worth it. Actually, if you have proof, adultry is illegal in the military and punishment can be as severe as military prison to getting kicked out! You deserve better!

    Answer by usafwifenmommy at 4:41 PM on Jul. 20, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.