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Hubby is a mystery?

I have been married for about 7 months now and we were together a yr before we were married... I fell madly in love with him and he with me and tells me everyday, we have a great relationship, lots of communication.... But, I feel like theres something he's not telling me. I have asked him numorous times what his past was like, with ex's etc... I know his last relationship his g/f was bi-sexual, but what i just recently found out is that she's into bondage, submission really freaky stuff... I want to know what part he played in it. He is the more dominant one in our relationship but I can also be at times, in the bedroom, i mean... So I'm wondering why he's with me, I don't get into all that, it scares the heck outta me....
I don't know why it bothers me, I guess when I'm with someone I need to know them inside out and I don't feel that way with him.... Any ideas?? Or am I just being paranoid?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 3:41 PM on Jan. 23, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • I would say your just freakn out.. Hez with you cause he loves you not cause you choke him with you 6in heels you have hiding under our bed... Dont push it you may find that he really didnt like that stuff and had a bad experance with it...

    Answer by HottMamaRossx2 at 3:45 PM on Jan. 23, 2009

  • Maybe he is tired of all that and loves that you are, well, you. I am sure he is with you for a reason, and not with her. Maybe he did all that because that is what she wanted and not necessarily what he wanted or wants. Also, maybe he doesn't share everything because he is not really happy with his past. Maybe you are his fresh new start and he wants to do it right this time.

    Answer by bellasrose71008 at 3:46 PM on Jan. 23, 2009

  • If you are happy with your private life as it is, then let his past go, as long as you were both checked for STDs of course. He may have liked that stuff at one time but no longer does, or he may not even have liked it much and came to realize it. It is a good idea that you are aware of this history, though, just in case he ever tries something and you are taken by surprise. I'd say to ask him, but see you already have.

    Answer by Bmat at 3:46 PM on Jan. 23, 2009

  • I don't think it's necessarily wrong of you to ask about his past, I would want to know too, but since he doesn't want to talk about it AND he decided to marry you, it might have just been a wild phase he went through with the ex and something he decided he didn't want to keep doing.

    The other thing is, you don't really know for sure what the truth is about his ex. Who told you she was into bondage and submission? That could be exagerations, or a one-time thing, so why get all worried about it now?

    Maybe as more time goes by he might get more comfortable talking about this stuff. He might think the truth will freak you out or cause you to lose respect for him if you know everything. I know what it's like to be super curious about someone, but since you married him, it's a little too late to demand answers.

    Answer by JustAMom2008 at 3:48 PM on Jan. 23, 2009

  • I personally think its wrong to ask about his sexual past.I know for a fact I don't want to know the whys and wheres about mine. Its none of my business what he did before we met.You know he has a past and thats really all that you need to know. As for sex and how you guys like it or how you like it or how he likes it, thats between you 2. Make it special for you 2 and don't bring anyone in on it. You are probably making him uncomfortable and you are making it hard on yourself. Make it special for you 2 and talk only about you 2,not someone from the past.

    Answer by Kat122 at 4:25 PM on Jan. 23, 2009

  • Girl so what if he likes bondage..You may llike it. As long as it is safe and does not hurt...get with it....He may be gay...never know

    Answer by MizzThom at 4:27 PM on Jan. 23, 2009

  • Don't worry so much if he used to be into bondage. You are just starting out and will go through trying many things to spice up your love life. So what if he were into something non traditional at one time. Hey it shows he is willing to try new things. Lighten up, as long as no one was hurt, no big deal.

    Answer by pnwmom at 4:42 PM on Jan. 23, 2009

  • bi? HE did things with guys? or the girl did things with girls?

    Answer by Sandiii at 6:12 PM on Jan. 23, 2009

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