Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

help please

OK ME AND MY SO (BABY DAD) HAVE BEEN TOGATHER ALMOST 2YEARS...WE HAVE A 3MONTH OLD SON BUT WE ARE STARTING TO HAVE PROBLEMS HES CONSTATLY PLAYING THE VIDEO GAME FROM THE TIME HE GETS HOME TIL WE GO TO BED TAKES NO TIME WITH OUR SON GETS MAD WHEN I ASK HIM TO HELP MEE I MEAN HE WORKS 3-4 DAYS A WEEK AT A PRISON I MEAN COME ON NOW THATS NOT TO MUCH WHEN HES OFF HE DONT DO NOTHING BUT PLAY THAT GAME HE SAYS IM OVER REACTING BUT DAMN WHEN DOES THIS END WHEN DO I GET A BREAK I TEND TO OUR SON 24/7 NO HELP OFFERED FROM ANYONE IN MY OPINION HES A FREAKING DAD NOW TIME TO GROW UP RIGHT? I DONT HAVE A PROBLEM WITH HIM PLAYING THE GAME BUT HE DOESNT HAVE TO PLAY IT ALL THE TIME HE QUITS LONG ENOUGH TO GO TO THE BATHROOM AND GET SOMTHING TO EAT THATS IT..ANYTHING I SAY HE GETS MAD AT...WHAT DO I DO

Answer Question
 
Destinty

Asked by Destinty at 10:10 PM on Jan. 23, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • my husband did that when we first had our son. i think its a man thing and they dont really know what to do with a small baby
    SThompson21

    Answer by SThompson21 at 10:11 PM on Jan. 23, 2009

  • SEE I THOUGHT THAT TO FOR A WHILE BUT COME TO THINK OF IT HE HAS BEEN LIKE THIS SINCE I GOT PREGNAT....
    Destinty

    Answer by Destinty at 10:19 PM on Jan. 23, 2009

  • Give him an ultimatum, I think its immature. My hubby would play mostly at night and part of the weekend. He still helped me out tho. He decided to trade his xbox 360 in for a wii, he was sick of getting mad at his favorite game and he wanted a family system. I was surprised but now he doesnt play as much and we both can play together when our son goes to bed. Good luck I feel your pain.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:25 PM on Jan. 23, 2009

  • I would tell him you are going shopping and leave him at the house with the baby. He has already become spoiled to the fact that you are going to do whatever it takes to care for your baby(as you should), but he also needs to learn that you need help and time for yourself. Obviously he is not going to give it to you, so you will have to take it.
    As for the game, he will have to make the decision to stop playing. As hard as it is, try to stop nagging and arguing over it. Try sitting down with him for a few minutes and tell him that you feel alone/neglected and tired and would like some help. Find a compromise between childcare and videogames. Maybe he can only play games after the baby has been fed or changed or put down (that way he doesn't feel like he is giving up his game).Also talk to him about equal "me time" where each of you get the same amount of alone time to do as you like (sleep/manicure/shop/etc).
    gwood

    Answer by gwood at 10:44 PM on Jan. 23, 2009

  • sometimes I think men jsut freak out. it took my husband to actually spend 8 HOURS!!! in front of his freakin PS2 then I came home from work and he was sitting in front of it. It was a wake up call for him and I sold it on Ebay. anyway, Maybe hes just panicked or maybe just immature and not ready to accept responsiblitly. Tell him you are going to stay with family for a while until you can get some help. don't be scared to ask for help. its bette than burning out and losing your patience. Good luck sweetie! and remember, you NEED to do what's best for you and your BABY. You don't want your baby growing up in that situation.
    calliesmommie

    Answer by calliesmommie at 10:47 PM on Jan. 23, 2009

  • Mine plays games or is on the computer the whole day. He does take care of our DD while I am at work for the 4 hour shifts that I work. I have convinced him that since I feed her solids he gets the baths. Since i do the laundry he has to put it away. We worked out some things that work for us, but it took us a few months to figure it out. I also get a girls night out once in a while. I wish you all the luck.
    coala

    Answer by coala at 10:59 PM on Jan. 23, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.