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4 Bumps

Essay Question.

I have to write an essay and the topic is, "In what way would I like to improve my life".
How does this sound for an Introduction?

Improving my life In a positive way Is the only way I would like everything to go.
If only If It was that easy.
Im always thinking of ways to Improve, but not just life In general.
I always feel a need of Improvement. Even If I did a damn good job.
Sometimes good Is just not good enough.

Need your advice ladies!
Add a lil more or take some off or let it be?


Asked by Anonymous at 1:36 AM on Apr. 8, 2012 in

This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • I am so sorry that the other ladies did not get that this is just yr introduction. But yes for an intro it is very good!

    Answer by Fairymom32 at 2:22 AM on Oct. 21, 2012

  • It doesn't really answer the question.
    Would you improve your life by getting healthier, going to school, volunteering at homeless shelter....etc. That's the question.

    Answer by meooma at 8:20 AM on Apr. 8, 2012

  • i dont understand what you were trying to say in your essay.... it doesnt give a lot of information. the first paragraph has to catch the attention of the reader....

    Answer by trystons_mommy at 7:37 PM on Apr. 11, 2012

  • An essay is more than just a paragraph. Do you know how long it needs to be? Just take the subject, write it down, as in my first sentence and then expound on how you will change it. I have just give you an example of one of my pet peeves about others.

    example: I want to improve how I relate to people in general. My first step is to really listen to others. I tend to just half hear what is said and if asked to respond, I can't. Therefore I need to give them my whole attention, really listen to what they say and be able to respond appropriately. If I'm asked to give an opinion, I will be truthful and if it's a little less than positive I will find the most positive way of saying it.

    Answer by Xlandria at 2:43 PM on Jul. 4, 2012

  • May I ask the typr of essay that you are writing? Descriptive,

    Answer by ILOVEMYBOYS704 at 9:16 PM on Jul. 15, 2012

  • I like it

    Answer by Im-HiDdEn at 10:45 AM on Feb. 22, 2013

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