Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How do you deal with a dad/BF who wanted nothing to do with you when you were pregnant and now he wants to take your child from you?

my bf left me when I was 4 in a half months pregnant and wanted nothing to do with me and now that my daughter is here he is threatening to take her and we are going to see a mediator soon, I have a lawyer and he doesn't. He also threatened me physically and emotionally and mentally abused me while we were together. What should I do? What can I do to keep him away from my daughter. He is Bi Polar and does not take medication. I am afraid he will freak out on her if he were to have visitation.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 3:21 AM on Jul. 20, 2008 in Babies (0-12 months)

Answers (6)
  • You need to bring all this up in court and try to have all the proof you can. In this case if they find him unsuitable you can get supervised visitation required for him. I think with his mental illness and walking out on you, you have a fighting chance. Good luck.

    Answer by StevensWife at 3:25 AM on Jul. 20, 2008

  • You have justifiable and legit reasons for keeping your child all to your self. If you dont want him to see his daughter do not agree to anything in mediation and take it to court. Mediation is trying to resolve it outside of court... Take it all the way, and make sure that you tell them why you left, what he is like, and his illness. They may however say he gets supervised visitations. You can make that so he has to come on your terms. Dont let her out of your sight when he is with her... Good Luck!

    Answer by taracv at 5:48 AM on Jul. 20, 2008

  • you need to speak up for your rights tell the mediation what you said about everything about him. you can even tell them that you want him tested for drugs.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:14 PM on Jul. 20, 2008

  • The mediator will try (really try) to get you both to come to an agreement so beware of that going in. I would disagree with whatever the mediator says (unless an agreement is made in your favor) and go to court. I can't see a judge awarding visitation or custody to someone like your ex.

    Answer by MrsHart6 at 6:47 PM on Jul. 20, 2008

  • Make sure you DOCUMENT everything, and try to have as much proof as possible if it would go beyond mediation and into court this is very important. Otherwise, the judge will look at it as he said/she said..and throw it out as hear say. Good luck.

    Answer by Pa_mommy2_4 at 10:27 PM on Jul. 20, 2008

  • He is playing you. If you have a lawyer and he doesn't that means you are paying out the wazoo and he is paying ZIP. DOCUMENT everythinggggg like PAMOMMY said.

    Answer by TXdanielly at 12:34 AM on Jul. 21, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.