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Keep in mind, my son has autism.
My ex brought our son home from his visit today. He sent me a text about 15 minutes before he came home saying "He needs to go right to his room, he has been acting out"
They pulled up and I walked out of the house. My son comes up the walk crying and saying "I don't want to go to my room" I open my arms and he comes to me and I give him a hug. I then tell him that he needs to go to his room. Which he did.
My ex then sends me a text saying "You shouldn't have greeted him with open arms the way he was acting. I hope you did as I asked and put him in his room"
I texted him back that I did indeed put him in his room, but while he needs to know we don't like his behavior, he should know that we love him.
He then said "Well, next time you ask me to punish him, I'll be sure to act accordingly". With a little smiley face. I know him, that means he is saying he won't follow through because I did this.
I asked him why I was wrong. He said "Because he is almost 13 and this shit needs to stop"
I said "he is autistic, he will never be normal. We need to do the best we can given his limitations. Emotionally, he is about 7 if that. We need to teach him, but we can't do it as if he were normal."
Was I wrong to hug him when he came home? Was it really THAT bad that?
Answer by booklover545 at 6:08 PM on Apr. 13, 2012
By no means where you acting out by greeting your son to reassure him, He still needs to feel loved and wanted . If you co parent then ok so be it let the ex do what he feels is right (WITH IN REASON) ... obviously he does not see fit to show emotion when your son is misbehaving, what a shame in that!! Your child is Autistic and will always be and his feelings get hurt much easier than someone his own age without Autism ... Keep doing your work Momma your child will thank you when he is older perhaps raising his own child or children with his love.
Answer by jessicasmom1 at 10:29 AM on May. 11, 2012