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How do you talk to a three year old about protecting her body from offenders?

My three year old has not been to daycare or preschool yet, and I am afraid teachers, as much as they may try, just can't watch every child every second they are there. I know that there are very young children out there that have experienced awful things and then they go and do the same things to other children. My daughter speaks well, so I believe if someone hurt her she would tell me, especially if I asked; but I just want to know how I can tell her in a way she will comprehend that if anyone touched her private areas or did anything else that made her uncomfortable she should tell mommy and daddy or another trusted adult right away.

Any constructive advice is greatly appreciated!


Asked by wondercat at 8:06 PM on Jan. 25, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

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Answers (5)
  • I am probably way OVERBOARD here- but I was sexually molested and raped when I was younger- so from the very beginning since my daughter was born I taught her that she has a butt, a vagina (I use the full word), and breasts (which she nicknamed boobies). I told her that she was not under ANY circumstances to allow someone to touch them besides mommy and daddy and that if someone touches her breasts, butt, or vagina she needed to scream for help. We talk through different scenarios and she will be 3 in March. So I am VERY serious about this- a thought- do you know that MOST people who are molested are molested by someone they know and the parents trusted? Yes a daycare is an issue, but so is going next door to her neighbor's house. Unfortunately it's a scary world now a days- but I pray my daughter will embrace what I have taught her- especially as a Hugs, and PM me if you need other suggestions.

    Answer by lovetoteachec at 8:37 PM on Jan. 25, 2009

  • Just be honest, but simple. Teach her her private areas. And tell her those are only for her and if anyone else tries to touch or look she needs to tell you or daddy.

    Answer by ZaTa at 8:12 PM on Jan. 25, 2009

  • I don't think you can ever be too careful with this one. lovetoteach is right, make sure she knows her parts but include her doctor in the list of those who might "touch" her. Going to preschool or daycare the first time is always scary. I have a boy in kindergarten and I hung out at recess the first week spying to make sure he was okay. It's a hurdle but giving her the info is the right thing to do.

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 11:07 PM on Jan. 25, 2009

  • There are probably some age appropriate books to read and use for discussion.

    Answer by LovetoTeach247 at 7:36 AM on Jan. 26, 2009

  • With little kids I always start by asking questions to see what they already know or think. Ask her if she knows where her private parts are. Depending on her answer you can show her and start from there. I would just be sure to tell her that no one should ever touch them unless it is mommy or daddy or the doctor and they are trying to help her. NO ONE at school should ever touch them. That should be enough that she will understand and will tell you if someone did. This is what I did with my dd and that was a year ago. Even now once in awhile she will say mommy no one is allowed to touch my private parts but me lol.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:21 AM on Jan. 26, 2009