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I am in my early 20's and have absolutely no sex drive! Help!

So I'm a mother of 4.I'm a sahm also.I have no sex drive whatsoever.My husband is in good shape,very cute,and I love him to death.We don't have any trouble in our marriage.I'm not overweight and I feel pretty good about how I look overall.I just don't know whats wrong with me.At this point I can't even get anything to trigger.My husband has tried being romantic,massaging,anything you can think of and I really,really want to in my mind but my body just doesn't respond! What the heck is worng with me!?!

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Asked by Anonymous at 5:20 PM on Jun. 19, 2008 in Health

Answers (6)
  • I have the same problem. I too am a SAHM and the last thing I want is to have sex. I think after being at home all day the last thing I want is for someone else to be wanting my attention. But I have heard that you have to jump start your sex drive by just doing it even if you are not in the mood and your body will crave it the more you have it.

    Answer by zaksmom8278 at 5:51 PM on Jun. 19, 2008

  • There are many things that can contribute to this. For me a HUGE sex drive killer is birth control. Right behind that is sleep deprivation. Also I get really tired of being touched after a full day with my son. Try to get a sitter and have some alone time. I personally felt very uncomfortable in my body after pregnancy took its toll. I can't say that I am over it. But I am starting to realize that I wouldn't trade my son for a perfect body. Also make sure that when you do have sex, you take time and make sure it is enjoyable for you.

    Answer by firstimemom4049 at 7:17 PM on Jun. 19, 2008

  • That was weird, it cut me off. I find that a run of bad sex does more to kill my sex drive then anything.

    Answer by firstimemom4049 at 7:18 PM on Jun. 19, 2008

  • You could have a hormonal imbalance. You should consult your ob/gyn for blood test that could signal a condition called poly cystic ovary syndrome.
    Do you: Have irregular periods? Have weird hairgrowth? Have a dry vaginal area?
    Some things to try are: Refresh, it is in the lubricate area in the store and it restores the natural balance of your vaginal area. Also can try this online store for a cream called viva cream:
    This stuff is a LIFE and SEX saver!!!! You rub it on your clit area and then WoW~ you have a nice sensation in your area that makes you have a BIG desire for your husband to love you. That along with the Refresh has been a true life saver for me and my hubby of 13 years, we are so happy we found this stuff!
    Good Luck!

    Answer by Funx3 at 2:06 AM on Jun. 20, 2008

  • Even if you are comfy with your body...try getting some exercise. It will stimulate you. Try to find someone to swap babysitting chores so both of you can have some alone time...whether to workout, read, clean (yick) or whatever. I have had to utilize KY on occasion, and it is amazing. Probably any product of that nature as stated above. Hire a sitter and get a couples's fun! Solicite family, church memebers...anyone to give you a hand!!! There is no shame in asking for help! Good luck.

    Answer by traciesbw0101 at 8:40 AM on Jun. 20, 2008

  • I have a new baby(6 weeks) and my sex drive went down the toilet for a while. He is now wanting sex all the time and I just don't feel it. For me its because of the stress of getting up in the night to feed him and I'm horribly tired b.c of it. He's VERY colicky and I spend 9 hours a day trying to calm a fussy baby. There's nothing wrong with you. Its normal. Try to find someone who can watch your children so you and your husband can find time together alone. Maybe it will help start things up. Its hard to feel sexual in a house full of children.

    Answer by LaurenKaye29 at 3:25 PM on Jul. 14, 2008

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