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Racist mother biracial daughter, what do I do?

My mother is racist, my daughter is mixed. Her grandmother love's her very much. It's the father that she can't stand, and it is because he's black. How do I get her to quit talkin bad about my daughters dad? Any suggestions would be great....

 
crystal_d2144

Asked by crystal_d2144 at 9:47 PM on Jan. 25, 2009 in Relationships

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This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • Tell her how much she is damaging her granddaughter by her attitude. She doesn't have to change it, just keep silent in the presence of ther grandaughter who is part of this man she doesn't like.
    SusieD250

    Answer by SusieD250 at 9:49 PM on Jan. 25, 2009

  • My mother used to do things like that and I told her she was childish. Then I told her I'd fight her childishness w/ my own and I would not allow her alone w/ my child at all until she stopped. Everytime she did it after that I picked my dughter up and took her home until she finally stopped.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:52 PM on Jan. 25, 2009

  • I agree with Susie, but I would also add, "and if you cannot do this, you will not be able to spend time with your granddaughter." It is very damaging to a child's self-esteem and security to have one of their parents degraded in front of them. Eventually she would see this as, grandma thinks Daddy is bad because he's black. I have part of Daddy in me, she must think I'm bad too. If she truely, unselfishly loves your daughter, she'll be able to respect your wishes.
    Mishelly728

    Answer by Mishelly728 at 9:53 PM on Jan. 25, 2009

  • I think that Anon. has a way that would work.
    kaysha

    Answer by kaysha at 10:05 PM on Jan. 25, 2009

  • I agree with the above answers.
    extremelibrary

    Answer by extremelibrary at 10:10 PM on Jan. 25, 2009

  • If she can't be civil, then she can't see her granddaughter. Period.

    My husband cut his mother off because of her attitude toward me.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 10:19 PM on Jan. 25, 2009

  • Sooner or later she is going to have to except her it was not  her fault this happened it happens she should love her no matter what if she continues to be this way take her away from her and I bet then she will change her tune, but the part about the dad if she feels this way towards him that is just the way she feels but she could stop saying things about him she should keep it to herself. I would just seperate from her for alittle while let her think about what she is doing and she will be missing you guys soon.good luck

    Butterfly1108

    Answer by Butterfly1108 at 10:59 PM on Jan. 25, 2009

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