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I want to try to get pregnant but my husband's not ready.

I have a 5 year old son from a previous relationship. My husband and I have been married for a little over a year and have gone back and forth about when we want to have another child. When he's ready I'm not and when I'm ready he's not. It's driving me crazy. I'm going to be 26 years old next month and feel like my clock is ticking. I really want to have another baby and my husband keeps saying he wants to wait. I want us both to be ready so that when the test comes back positive we are both extatic. Everytime we talk about it I end up frustrated and feeling disappointed. Does anyone have any advice for me?

 
Lynsey27

Asked by Lynsey27 at 12:11 PM on Jan. 26, 2009 in Trying to Conceive

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Answers (8)
  • We are going through this right now. I was ready before, now he is. I got rid of every baby thing I ever owned from my first, who is almost 6 now! Not really sure if I can go through the prego thing again, and I turn 30 in a couple weeks. I want to, but it is a huge deal, we all have our ups and downs. I would def sit down and talk it out, maybe he will be ready in a couple months, just let him know your feelings and concerns also, maybe you could compromise. Godd Luck!
    79andi

    Answer by 79andi at 12:37 PM on Jan. 26, 2009

  • Well certainly wait until you are both ready. Otherwise it could bite you in the butt.

    But sit down and see why he isn't ready yet. Or what is fears are. If you can understand where he's coming from better you may be able to help him work through those issues and end up having him ready to have a baby now too.

    Good luck!
    munch12502

    Answer by munch12502 at 12:12 PM on Jan. 26, 2009

  • You need to sit down together and make a plan. See what goals you both want before getting pregnant so you can accomplish each and say ok now were ready. Also 26 isnt that old LOL. You have plenty of time.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 12:15 PM on Jan. 26, 2009

  • My and my husband went through this on our second child. He was ready and I was not and then I was ready and he wasn't. We had a heart to heart and I was able to understand why he changed his mind and after the talk I was able to help him through his concerns and he agreed to have another. Sometimes it is just concerns of money, time or problems at work that may cause someone to hesitate. Definately talk with him about why the hestitation.
    maddiemygirl

    Answer by maddiemygirl at 12:16 PM on Jan. 26, 2009

  • Just get pregnant accidentally, then there's nothing he can do about it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:33 PM on Jan. 26, 2009

  • Anon above said: Just get pregnant accidentally, then there's nothing he can do about it.

    This is HORRIBLE advice. No wonder they remained anonymous. That's a sure way to end your marriage. Tricking someone into being a father? Horrible.

    You're still young. Wait until you're both ready.
    StarLee

    Answer by StarLee at 12:39 PM on Jan. 26, 2009

  • They won't end their marriage by doing that. I really did accidentally become pregnant...I got off b/c because it was messing with my moods and 1 month later I was pregnant. Do you think I wanted to become pregnant? Hell no. Did it end our marriage? No, we dealt with it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:43 PM on Jan. 26, 2009

  • You might think you are "ticking" at 26 but you are very young yet. This needs to be a decision you are both on board about. I know how hard it is to wait but this is a life changing choice for both of you & if you really love him you will wait till he is ready as well.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:43 PM on Jan. 26, 2009