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Do you think I should let my son go with his father when i absolutely DISPISE his girlfriend? She and I used to be friends, she actually had her kid tooken away from her because they found weed in her system then attacked a cps worker. I know she wouldn't harm my child or her own

at that but I reallly don't think it's a good idea. she criticizes me like she has any place to makes up lies and rumors. shes very immature and i think she may be jelous. They think I won't let my son go over there because im 'jelous' but the truth is i'm not at all..when we ended it and he got with her i couldn't even stay mad cuz its just nasty. i let him see my son over at my house any time he wants but he thinks its wrong because i won't let him take him, any opinions?

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MannYzmaMa

Asked by MannYzmaMa at 6:26 PM on Jul. 20, 2008 in General Parenting

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • i think that you should go by your instinct, if its telling you not to then dont. But the baby should be able to see his father too. if u seriously trhought she'd harm your baby then dont. or try having him come over ur place 2 see the baby.
    deathmetalblack

    Answer by deathmetalblack at 6:29 PM on Jul. 20, 2008

  • Is there a visitation order in place?
    desert_diva

    Answer by desert_diva at 6:34 PM on Jul. 20, 2008

  • Nope no visitation. But I do let him see my son at my house.I don't want to be wrong but I don't want my son around her. I'm not usually a judgemental person at all but we used to be friends when i was younger and I stopped talking to her because of the way she was living. too bad it took having a baby to realize who your true friends are
    MannYzmaMa

    Answer by MannYzmaMa at 6:39 PM on Jul. 20, 2008

  • a family members so did this..since he hasnt really had a stable home of his own i guess..court order that on his days he has to be at grandmas, etc....this worked out threw many girlfriends of the biodad..but now she decided to move away with her new guy.
    carisa

    Answer by carisa at 7:13 PM on Jul. 20, 2008

  • you can get it written in the custody agreement that neither of you or your significant others can speak badly about the other infront of the child....if you're willing to abide by it too, you can also have it written in that neither of you are allowed to have a member of the opposite sex spend the night when the child is around (with the exception of being married of course)....i say you get the kinks worked out and then let your on go....you dont want your son coming to you when he's older and blaming you for not having a realtionship with his father or something like that....as long as you know your child is not in danger, i'd let him go so long as your ex will agree to reasonable terms
    LoriaAnn

    Answer by LoriaAnn at 8:54 PM on Jul. 20, 2008

  • Okay...so no custody order means your free to do as you see fit. How likely is it that he'll file for one if you keep your son from him? Is he not doing that because he doesn't want to get hit with a child support order as well?

    If she's bad mouthing you to your son, and his dad won't do anything about it, I'd have to think long and hard about sending him if I were in your place. Can you talk to dad? Let him know if he doesn't stop her behavior his visits will stop?
    desert_diva

    Answer by desert_diva at 9:08 PM on Jul. 20, 2008

  • Go with your gut, keep her AWAY from your kids!
    1hotlilmama

    Answer by 1hotlilmama at 9:49 PM on Jul. 20, 2008

  • If her baby had drugs in her system then she DID harm her child and she will harm yours. Anyone who can't care for their own child definetly cannot care for yours. Don't ever put your trust is this woman, especailly when it comes to your child's life.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:52 AM on Jul. 21, 2008

  • Get it in writing, gently, stating that only he and his blood relatives can come over to visit the baby.
    TXdanielly

    Answer by TXdanielly at 11:10 PM on Jul. 21, 2008

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