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My 21 month old gets so frustrated so quick, when i try to talk to him and tell him whats going in the situation, he then throws a fit. What am I doing wrong?

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Asked by Serenityc21 at 10:55 PM on Jan. 26, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

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Answers (6)
  • You aren't doing anything wrong. It's the age. I used The Happiest Toddler on the Block techniques only brought them down a notch and it totally helped. Check it out.

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 10:58 PM on Jan. 26, 2009

  • i dont think you are doing anything wrong, some kids especially at that age are just like that, i know mine was, i think it has to do with them knowing what they want but not really knowing how to communicate it. i hope that makes since.

    Answer by Mrs.Morimanno at 12:38 AM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • I don't know. Why is he getting frustrated? And what are you telling him exactly? How is your tone of voice?

    When my 2 year old gets frustrated, (such as if I pull the plug on the drain, and she thinks her bath toys are going to disappear) I try to talk to her calmly. If she's too worked up to listen, then I walk away and let her know I will talk to her when she's ready to listen. I give her 5 minutes if it's a really bad tantrum, then pull her into my arms and tell her that I need a hug. Once she has calmed down, I ask if she is listening, and then I explain to her what I was trying to tell her (ie: take her to the tub and show her her toys will not go down the drain, and why.)

    Answer by Liyoness at 3:32 AM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • It's the this age they can comprehend alot and they are gaining independence daily but they don't have the language to "tell you" their agenda.....that's where they problem lies. When you don't go with their plan they have limited ways of expressing that feeling completely and it comes out in a tantrum. My advice is speak in simple terms and as best you can reaffirm what you think it is their upset about and then tell them simply your direction.
    EX: You like playing with the play-doh it's fun. Your're mad that we have to put it away now. Time to clean up...We'll play it again later...(and then just clean it up....even if they tantrum)
    or use the bait and switch to avoid it if possible.....If you want to clean up the play-doh get out something else your child will like and do a switch a roo.

    Answer by deedee3849 at 9:00 AM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • Oh my gosh...My girl is only 17 months old, but I have a feeling this child will be stubbourn for the rest of her life! I wish the best to the person who marries her! LOL...I don't think there's much you really can do. Trying to reason with them if they are throwing a fit won't happen, and if you try to be stern and/or yell that won't work at all, it will just make things worse. But, what I do find that works is just not acknowledging the tantrum and continue doing what you are doing, or just show no reaction to the tantrum and look at him for a second....or walk away if it's safe to do so, and give your child time to cool off and realize his temper wasn't getting him anywhere. What I am learning is that until they are of the age to learn that the world really doesn't revolve around them, they will test to see how far they can get, and what they get in return.

    Answer by nrth2sth05 at 11:39 AM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • this is to everyone, thank for your ansewrs. Actually everything ya'll said to do, most of it i do. When i try to talk calmly, he still is freaken out. Sometime i end up yelling at him, cuz i get frustrated. And then other times i just walk away like one of ya'll said. But then i dont have to come back and reexplain to him to calm down cuz he went to playen with somethen else already. I feel his attention span is like 4. HE follows directions really well. He doesn't talk all. he knows like 8 words he himself can saw. But when i talk knows exactly what i'm saying...

    Answer by Serenityc21 at 10:27 PM on Feb. 1, 2009

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