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I will never understand this "everyone must win every time" attitude in youth athletics....

Kids need to learn to win gracefully & lose with dignity. They learn different lessons from each outcome, and these are HUGE life lessons here.  We don’t want to teach the kids that if things aren't going their way someone is going to come along and just “fix” it for them. Sometimes you lose. Yeah it sucks, but it does make you stronger, you learn and you move on. It’s been my experience as a coach and a player that the athletes who show the most improvement are the ones that play on the teams with the most challenges.

If the parents can't accept that maybe they need to reevaluate! UGH!!!

Yes... I coach youth soccer... we have one coach that thinks if her team is loosing by more the 5 goals we should stop the game, divide up the teams differently, use pinnies and restart the game at zero. WTH??   


Asked by Crafty26 at 11:49 AM on May. 1, 2012 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

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Answers (6)
  • AGREED!!!! It's scary to think you can really go through life and WIN at everything. It's simply not realistic and that's a lot of the problems with kids these days.

    Answer by m-avi at 11:56 AM on May. 1, 2012

  • i don't understand it either..its brought on a sense of entitlement that every one who participates, gets a trophy. why? that isn't preparing them for real life..or even sports as they get older!
    no offense, but don't get me started on parent-coaches, either...the kind where, yes its volunteering, but their kid is on the team, too.
    i wish there were a way to rule out that little piece of it..but i know there'd probably be less volunteer coaching, too.

    Answer by dullscissors at 11:55 AM on May. 1, 2012

  • That is crazy! When my kids were really little (4-5 yo) they didn't even bother keeping score and I liked that at that age because the kids didn't really care what the score was, they were just playing because it was fun. However, once they hit elementary school they should be okay with losing and able to lose gracefully. My 2nd child had a huge problem with it and it was hard to teach him it was okay to lose, but we did it a lot with board games within the family until he understood that it was okay. It's a hard lesson for some, but one that needs to be learned. The earlier they learn it, usually the better they handle it.

    Answer by missanc at 11:58 AM on May. 1, 2012

  • There are two sides to this argument and it is one our family has gone over many, many times.The kids have been on both sides of this one. Sadly there do not seem to be many recreational sports for kids to participate in any more, so even those that want a non-cutthroat team have a hard time finding it.

    There are ways to win with class and to lose with dignity, but these days that seems to be a lost art in coaches and players both (in general). Those are the lessons we taught our kids, and they are the lessons our kids teach year after year to the 100's of kids they have coached.


    Answer by emptynstr at 11:58 AM on May. 1, 2012

  • I hate how entitled kids re for doing nothing at all. I coached soccer as well, but my kid got no special treatment if nothing he got rode harder then is team mates. I wish they would bring back tryouts. Make kids work for what they want, if they suck thy work harder and try out next year.

    Answer by Mrs_Harsh at 11:58 AM on May. 1, 2012

  • I agree with you. My son played soccer last year and it was stupid, they really didn't keep score so unless you were really paying attention, you didn't even know who won, it wasn't announced or anything. They were 4 and I think at this age, they need to learn that sometimes you don't always win

    Answer by loveMYkids5488 at 5:18 AM on May. 2, 2012