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A single working mother's blight

This question is coming from a mother (in her early forties) who has baby fever remaining from a failed relationship, and who responsible for all expenses and debt.
I am currently in a financial lock, which is not a struggle for position or for money, but just to survive (with debt). I'm struggling with added frustration that my head and heart are not working together when I'm trying to think straight about my life. Life is not allowing me to be a proper mother to my teen daughter, let alone even to consider to be a mother again.

I'm am trying to get out of this funky depression. Any suggestions?

(My daughter has had a good life with a sisterhood of friends and other mothers that I contribute well in thanks. She has grown to be a very well mannered young lady.)

Answer Question

Asked by BlueSaphire at 9:14 AM on Jan. 27, 2009 in Health

Level 21 (11,698 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • i am sorry you are so stressed right now. make sure you are taking care of yourself first. i was always against this saying a mother puts her kids first and then someone pointed out to me that it is not that you are NOT putting them first, in order to take care of them to the best of your ability to help them the most you must make sure you are fine. as she said, it is like being a plane and the oxygen masks come down. if you don't want to pass and not be able to take care of your kids, you need to put your mask on first. are you on a good vitamin? have you ever considered doing a side business outside of your work??? something part time (that could possibly move to full time?) if you would like more info, you can go to my home page and click on YOUR FAMILY FIRST. prayers are with you!

    Answer by ArmyWifeMomof3 at 9:31 AM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • Just wait, in a few years maybe your daughter will have a baby, and you won't have to make the commitment to another child!

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:47 AM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • Life is not allowing me to be a proper mother to my teen daughter

    I don't understand this statement. Whats hindering you? Aside from money problems. We all have those. Is it too personal to mention? Just curious.

    Answer by momofsaee at 10:27 AM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • momofsaee- It's all about work. I had to work, no exceptions. I had to pay rent, bill, and loan payments. I couldn't be at home when my daughter got off from school. It's really hard to be the father and mother at once, but I did the best I knew how. And you know, working world works in vicious cycles, up and down. Without an income, there's no home.

    Answer by BlueSaphire at 10:41 AM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • i just wanted to add, that your daughter will see all the sacrifaces you have made for her. it might not be today or tomorrow, but she will look back on it and see all you gave up so that you could give her food and shelter. it might not be for a few yrs (took me until i was grown and out of the house living on my own) but she will appreciate it (i am sure she probably already does). you may have not welcomed her home when she got off the bus, but i am sure you are there for her in other ways. in this economy, nothing is easy these days. so many more worries and stresses coming. you are teaching your daughter an important lesson through it all, and that is what a strong woman you are and how she can be a strong woman no matter the ups and downs in life.

    Answer by ArmyWifeMomof3 at 10:59 AM on Jan. 27, 2009

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