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to rock or not to rock?

so ever since my son was little I put him on my lap and we sit on the rocking chair read a story then he would go to sleep withen 20 minutes.
well he's 20 months now and we still do that exept that he's getting bigger and heavier and older and it's going to be impossible to do that as my belly gets bigger too, I tried reading him a story then puting him in his crib, but he'll cry, scream, bang his feet, shake the bed really hard, throw all his blankets and toys off the bed then cry for them, and that goes on for over 2 hours then I just have to go in and pick him up.
the problem is my son would wake up everyday at 7 no matter how late he sleeps, sometimes he would be up in his crib till 11 and he wake up at 7 all crancky and not happy.
so ladies, any advice for me, oh and also what about naps? if I leave him in his crib and it takes him 2 hours plus to sleep then he would nap later and that would mess up his schadule?

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Asked by Shaima78 at 9:32 AM on Jan. 27, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 2 (9 Credits)
Answers (14)
  • I don't have too much advice, other than to not go in and pick him up. The more that he realizes that you will be in to get him, the more he will stay awake.
    Do you still rock him while you are reading his story? I would do that, and then put him straight to bed. Is he afraid of the dark?
    My son would not go to sleep in his bed for weeks recently until he told us that he doesn't like to dark. (he is 2 1/2) We plugged in some LED lights, and I leave his door part open and he goes to sleep just fine.
    My daughter (18 months) doesn't like to take her naps either, but I let her kick and scream until she is asleep, I never go and get her. Once she realized I wasn't coming back in until she took her nap, she laid down and went to sleep.
    Just an idea.

    Answer by NewMommyin06 at 9:43 AM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • all i can say is find a new routine and stick to it. he is use to his routine and that is what he knows. are you going to do the same routine with the new one? if so i would just tuff it out and stick to it, if not then find your new routine now and stick to it till he gets use to it. he is old enough to know what you are saying and what bed time means, he is pulling your strings to get what he wants. it might take a few weeks but he will get use to the new routine. good luck.

    Answer by setliff at 9:45 AM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • No baby/toddler/child should be left alone to cry - IMHO that is near-neglect.

    There is nothing wrong with parenting your child to sleep at any age - be that by nursing, rocking, singing, reading etc.


    Answer by ladysavage at 10:10 AM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • to ladysavage , I didn't find a problem with rocking him to bed until my belly is started to get in the way, it's very uncomfortable to rock a 20 month old for 20-20 minutes against a grownig belly!
    what do you suggust I should do?

    Answer by Shaima78 at 10:37 AM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • Could you sit in a stationary chair beside the rocker and just let him sit in it and cuddle with a pillow while you read the story and rock the chair?

    Answer by Kimebs at 10:54 AM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • I didn't find a problem with rocking him to bed until my belly is started to get in the way, it's very uncomfortable to rock a 20 month old for 20-20 minutes against a grownig belly!

    I'd find a way. I'm almost 38 weeks pregnant and despite my belly I still manage to nurse my son to sleep everynight. No way would I ever let him cry and scream for two hours. Maybe lay on your side or use a pillow to prop him or something. My son is 23 months by the way. Good luck.

    Answer by Pauline3283 at 11:03 AM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • I am not neglecting my children by letting them cry themselves to sleep. It took less than a week, and less than 1/2 a day, and they now have set sleep patterns. It helped them in the long run. At some point all children need to learn to go to sleep by themselves. Do not accuse me of neglecting my children just because I chose a different method.

    Answer by NewMommyin06 at 11:18 AM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • ladysavage is wrong and has not learned an esential lesson of parenting - every family, every child, every situation is different. What works for one child may not work for another. What works for one family may not work for another. More understanding and less judging would really help this world of ours.

    My only advice to you is to pick something and stick with it. He has learned that throwing a fit gets him what he wants. That's all it is, plain and simple, a tantrum. How do you deal with a tantrum for a cookie? Deal with this the same way. He is long past old enough to learn boundaries and rules. Simply teach him the new rules. Tell him that this is what we are doing from now on and do it. Tell him what will happen and stick with it. He understands FAR more than you realize.

    Answer by kaycee14 at 12:04 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • At some point all children need to learn to go to sleep by themselves.

    Very true. The question is why it needs to invole crying. With just a little more research you can save your child the heartache. I have 5 children who go to bed when asked and sleep all night. Not one has ever cried it out. I personally do think it's neglectful. One gave me a problem and with a little reading I had his problems fixed in a week with no tears. I don't see why parents can't put in a little more effort to save their kids from crying alone in the dark and BEGGING for them to help them.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:07 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • Well, anonymous, I tried everything. Literally. I read the much hyped "The No Cry Sleep Solution". It made things worse. I read quite a few other "gentle" sleep books. I tried rocking her to sleep. She would not relax and sleep in my arms. I tried baby massage, gently rubbing her back, patting her back, sitting next to her, sitting nearby, etc, etc, etc. If I was in the room, she would NOT sleep. She will not sleep if there is any stimulation. She was this way from her first week of life. In the end, I quit trying to be "gentle and loving" since I realized what I wanted wasn't what she NEEDED. What matters is her health and needs. Once I let my daughter go to sleep in the way she wanted, her appearance improved, her attitude improved. The bags under her eyes went away and I discovered what a beautiful, happy child she truly was.

    Answer by kaycee14 at 12:34 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

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