I don't really know where to begin so I guess I'll start at the beginning. I have been best friends with this guy since grade school. We would tell each other everything and I don't know why but we just never got together. We kissed at our high school graduation but we decided that nothing could be because we were going to college in different states. We stayed in touch over the years sporatically.
Over the years we sort of went our own ways and never talked. I got married and had 2 beautiful children with my husband. We moved back to my hometown since my husband got a new job near there. I saw my friend at a family friend's Christmas party. I can't explain it other than that it was an instant thing. He smiled at me from across the room and walked right over to me and he hugged me. He told me that he missed me. His wife walked over to us and introduced herself and his 2 kids.
Since we frequent at the same places and we have mutual friends we always give each other looks and smile at each other a lot. I feel like I love him and I feel really bad. I don't know who to really talk to. I don't want to tell my husband because he's the jealous type. I recently went out with a couple of girlfriends and we went to this restaurant/bar and he was there with his brother. We ended up talking all night and he told me that he really missed me and he asked me we never got together. I told him that the timing was never right it seems. There was an awkward silence for a while and then he leaned in and tried to kiss me. I pulled away and said that we can't, we're both married. He apologized and we took a cab home.
Ever since that night I've replayed everything in my head. What if I kissed him? What would have happened after? Right now I'm at home, my husband's at work, my son is at preschool and my youngest is asleep in his crib and here I am fantasizing about someone who isn't my husband. I feel like the worst person ever. I would never act on these urges, but I just feel like my heart is drifting away to another man and here I am. When we see each other we give each other a look. He seems sad. I'm sure I do too.
Is there any advice how to get over this? I don't want to reck anyone's marriage, especially mine. All I know is that I have love for my husband but I'm feeling love for this other man. I haven't spoken to him in a while, not even when we see each other at family/friend things. I just feel like I'm dying inside sometimes. I want to please everyone but it's wearing on me. I keep my husband and children happy but at night I lie awake thinking about this love I have.
Asked by Anonymous at 4:12 PM on May. 2, 2012 in Relationships
Answer by Simplicity3 at 4:15 PM on May. 2, 2012
Answer by BrawnwynII at 4:22 PM on May. 2, 2012
Answer by Anonymous at 4:51 PM on May. 2, 2012
Answer by Ludvik_Smith at 5:00 PM on May. 2, 2012
Answer by amazinggrace83 at 5:41 PM on May. 2, 2012
Answer by Nynne at 6:33 PM on May. 2, 2012
Answer by Nynne at 6:36 PM on May. 2, 2012