Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Did I make a mistake?

I feel kinda bad about this- is it a big deal? I was babysitting a 4 year old yesterday and took him and my 2 yo and 1 yo to a doctors appointment. It was SUPPOSED to be basically a "meet your new doctor" and ask a few questions about my birth control, but my doc INSISTED on giving me a pap and breast exam. So I did all of this with the kids in the room. My own kids, I don't really care. But is it sick and wrong to be undressing and getting a pap/breast exam with someone elses 4 yo in the room? I feel really bad about it, but I didn't have much of a choice! I suppose I could've flat out said no, but this was my first visit to my new doc office and with the IUD problems, she was concerned for my health....


Asked by livn4hevn at 10:52 AM on Jan. 27, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 11 (622 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (12)
  • It probably would have been better to have rescheduled. "I wasn't under the impression the exams would be done and I'll have to reschedule for another day when I don't have an extra kid in tow"

    However, the dad knew you had a doctor's appointment, you distracted them...but it would probably be better if you did tell the dad. Just in case that 4 year old is anything like mine and the question comes up in another week! lol

    Seriously...tell the dad..but tell it all! That you had him distracted and that he didn't see anything!

    Answer by TiccledBlue at 2:07 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • Oh! I should add that he didn't SEE anything. He wasn't sitting with a birds eye view of my whootie-haw.... I even distracted the boys with imagination games and funny jokes. I don't think he realized what was going on but I can't be sure.

    Answer by livn4hevn at 10:54 AM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • kind of i guess i would of ask the nurse to watch him i guess for he wasn't yours he was old enough to be like whats that so i hope you told his mom

    Answer by josalin at 10:56 AM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • oh well that's better but i would still tell his mother just in case he asks her about it

    Answer by josalin at 10:58 AM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • I would have rescheduled for another time. I wouldn't be comfortable with a doc who couldn't understand why I didn't want an exam with 3 kids in tow. Having said that, I don't think it is a big deal that it happened. Nudity is not a big deal in our house. If the child's mom doesn't feel likewise, then it could be a problem. Either way I hope you told her about it.

    Answer by riotgrrl at 10:58 AM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • Well his mom isn't very involved with him- he is under his dad's full custody. I told his dad I had a doctors appointment BEFORE the appointment, and I wasn't sure what else to tell him (since he's a male) afterwards . So I stuck with "yes he was well-behaved". Should I tell his DAD I had a pap and breast exam? That's so akward.... idk. Maybe my husband could tell him (since they work together and they are friends) "hey just wanted to tell you that the other day at my wife's appointment they did a breast exam and pap. She didn't know if you knew that (considering it was an Ob/Gyn appt and I wasn't pregnant he could prolly guess) ." Idk.. that's so akward.

    Answer by livn4hevn at 11:03 AM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • I would have rescheduled. I have had a couple of sonograms of my current pregnancy, and i would love for my daughters to get to see their new sibling, but my ultrasounds are vaginal so they can check my cervix as well- while nudity is not a big deal at our house either, but i draw the line at the possibly seeing some stranger shove something in the va jayjay...

    then again mine are very curious and would not be deterred by imagination games.etc.

    since it is done though daddy's going to have the opportunity for that interesting conversation on how boys and girls are different and let that be that. the kid will be fine.

    Answer by LuckyClown at 11:58 AM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • Probably would have rescheduled for another time. Should have just let doc know that you had no idea they were going to do "that" checkup on that particular day. I'm sure the kid's fine though. But, be sure to talk to the mom to explain the mix-up. That way, in case the kid makes a comment innocently enough in front of a parent, he/she'll know how to handle it.

    Answer by lighthousemom3 at 3:08 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • if that was my child i would be pressing charges (i do think it is illegal to let a child, not your own see your privates...) if possible and if not spreading the news about town so that no one else let you watch their kids while you had a pap exam and breast exam that is amazingly inappropriate and i would freak out if that was my son...

    Answer by AmaliaD at 3:23 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • Did you not read everything? She said he didn't see anything.

    Answer by TiccledBlue at 4:07 PM on Jan. 27, 2009