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My son is six and he is usually pretty happy at school but for a few months now he cries when I drop him off but he is happy when I pick him up afterschool. I have done all kinds of research, talked to his teacher, and I am generally at a loss. any ideas...

My son is very sensitive and it has been hard since all of his friends are in different first grade classes, but he still sees them at recess. I know there is one little boy in his class that teases him. His father and I have had numerous talks about bullies and teasing, read him "The peaceful warrior", talked to his teacher, who says everything is fine. I just want him to enjoy school and it is so hard in the morning to say goodbye and to do the recommended thing of walking away when my son is crying.

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cjsmom734

Asked by cjsmom734 at 12:24 PM on Jan. 27, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

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Answers (9)
  • So he's happy when you pick him up and his teacher says he's happy?

    I think you are making mountain out of molehill - don't add to the morning drama, just kiss/hug and goodbye.
    Wimsey

    Answer by Wimsey at 12:26 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • Teachers say everything is fine when there is no physical violence. But guess what. Your child's teacher does not see everything that goes on on the playground. Ask your son, really listen to what he says. Ask him where the teasing takes place. My kids went through this. Sometimes I really can't stand kids, they can be sooo mean.
    SusieD250

    Answer by SusieD250 at 12:27 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • I messaged you my answer so it would fit. I agree with SusieD.
    kirstanbrown

    Answer by kirstanbrown at 12:39 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

  •  If your son's school has a counselor, go and speak with them... let them talk to your son and observe him in his class...


     Teachers can not see everything all the time (I am a retired pre-school teacher) and unless there is a physical fight, they may not hear the verbal abuse or teasing that others may be doing...


     Go and talk to the teacher again... then if you have to the prinicipal and the school counselor, something happened to make your son unhappy to go to school...

    gmasboy

    Answer by gmasboy at 12:40 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • My daughter is almost 6 and gets upset when I drop her off at school too. She's a smart and friendly girl, with no potential bullying going on. I ask her why she cries sometimes and she says "Because I miss you so much". She's perfectly fine after I leave and so excited to see me when school gets out, it's just a morning thing with her. She's really really attached to me.
    slw123

    Answer by slw123 at 12:46 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • The fact that he was okay at first and now crying are red flags. Also, because he is happy to be picked up does not mean he is fine, he is just happy to be done with it. He may begin to tolerate a bad situation if it is ignored.
    kirstanbrown

    Answer by kirstanbrown at 12:48 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

  •  If I was you I would have a talk with your son maybe he can give you some insight on the situation. And just because the teacher says everything its ok don't mean it is. Maybe the boy teasing him is doing more than teasing him. Has he said that the mean boy hits him and the teachers don't see it.And I have known some teachers want do anything about it if they don't see it and just tell the child not to taddle tale.I know that cause it has happened to my son. Best of Luck!!

    FTBALLMOF2BOYS

    Answer by FTBALLMOF2BOYS at 1:14 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • My son was fine going to kindergarten too and now has problems going to 1st grade. He too says he misses me so much. I've had to drag him into school before because it was so bad he just sat and cried instead of going into the school. I've talked to the counselor, had her talk to him and all she can get out of him too is that he misses me while he's at school. He's even asked me to volunteer at his school or come eat lunch with him. I thought this was probably because we lost his father and all he has is me now. I'm glad to hear it's not just him though. He has an appointment to see a counselor to make sure it's not something more, but really, I hope it is just a phase.
    Jol77

    Answer by Jol77 at 12:51 PM on Jan. 28, 2009

  • I have separation anxiety issues with my almost 5yr old daughter. It's always when we have to separate, but once I am gone she stops crying immediately and has a great day. Please ask his teacher if he gets better right after you leave. It might be just the initial separation that is causing the problems. Also, can you try and have a few playdates with other boys in his class? If he can make a new best buddy, maybe that would help him. Also, on particuarly bad days my daughter brings a stuffed animal to class. its kind of frowned upon, but it gets her in there.
    moebonner

    Answer by moebonner at 10:49 PM on Feb. 2, 2009

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