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What would you do?

My SO's mother is trying to convince him that we shouldn't buy a house, now he doesn't see this, but anyone looking in would, the only reason she doesn't want us to is because then she will no longer hold any power over him and there will be no chance of him moving back in with her, a little back story, he's 28, joined the Navy when he was 20, was in for 4years, then moved back home with her, she forced him to spend 10,000(practically his whole life savings) to fix the crawl space in her house, she is a HUGE control freak, right now we are living with my dad(and it's really shitty cuz he treats us like crap) WE NEED out own place and we finally found one we like and she's trying to talk him out of it, what should i do! she's going to shit on him about it until he changes his mind about buying a house EVER!

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:05 PM on Jan. 27, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • Sounds horrible but YOU need to say something about it to her. It could be a change of subject in conversation with them or something like that? Or just tell her how it is people like that sometimes back down when you show you have balls about something that's that important to you. Just be overly cautious on how you say what you have to. Basically watch the body tone.
    watersgirls

    Answer by watersgirls at 1:09 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • I think you need to talk to your hubby.. tell him that you are both adults, and are ready to start a live of your own. But also tell him you are not trying to exclude either of your parents from your lives. Tell them they are invited to visit, so you can avoid stepping on too many toes, but that it's time to move on, and be the adults you both are.
    xxhazeldovexx

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 1:16 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • maybe just invest in it yourself under your own name and move in there yourself , hopefully he will come along and move in with you, if he chooses to live with his ma then you didnt lose out on anything.

    my sis made her mistake of putting her and her bf name on a house and now that, according to her, he said he was going to pay for the house when they split up, he didnt do it so it was a constant battle in courts because no one wanted to pay for the house and it foreclosed.

    the state took their tax money for years until it was paid off, this way if you put it under your name or someone else's you trust, you have control.

    americansugar80

    Answer by americansugar80 at 1:21 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • ooh, i wouldn't want to be in your shoes..you've hooked up with a momma's boy, for sure. don't really know what to tell ya, but if he's that attached to what his momma thinks (as his actions have proved), you may find yourself on the bad side of the whole deal, and momma on the good side, as far as he's concerned. having said that, yes, its time he grows up to be a man, especially if you guys are having a family together. just remember, momma will always be momma..tread lightly.
    thehairnazi

    Answer by thehairnazi at 1:28 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • ask him not to talk to her until after you guys have moved in to your new house. it's a buyers market. also if you wait there will probably be even better deals. probably not as many as you like. husbands want to make their wives happy so just pressure him back and tell him he has to live with your for the rest of his life so who is more important to make happy. he will see you are.
    melody77

    Answer by melody77 at 1:51 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

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