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so my boyfriend and i have only been together almost 3 years... the first year was amazing.. but during the pregnancy, our relationship was awful.. he cheated and we broke up, took acouple of months and worked things out.. needless to say, now things are wonderful, the baby is 6 months old, he has changed so much since the baby got here, everything between us is great... but i still doubt him sometimes, i don't know if i can trust him, i always wonder about other girls..etc... how can i overcome this? can our relationship still work, we have a really strong connection and i love him, i know he loves me... i just don't know how to trust him again.. completely....??

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Asked by sweetmama8 at 3:36 PM on Jan. 27, 2009 in Relationships

Level 2 (4 Credits)
Answers (4)
  • Has he done anything else to make you not trust him? If not, you need to just let it go, it will only cause more problems in your relationship. If you have forgiven him then just allow yourself to move on and focus on all the great things in your relationship. I'm not saying forget what happened because you don't want to let it happen again, but don't hold it against him if it was truly just a lapse in judgment. I think trust is the absolute most important thing in any relationship, both being able to trust and be trusted.

    Answer by bltcahill at 3:44 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • That will only come with time and some work. He did break your trust, so a few things need to happen. He needs to understand that you will think about the past and it may affect your mood towards him now. You need to believe him (especially if he is doing as you say and really trying) when he says he wants to be with you. Part of showing him you are trusting him is to NOT check up on him (like i know you really want to). And whenever your feelings from being cheated on come up, he needs to allow you to discuss them and you need to really hear him when he talks about things as well.

    Answer by ozarkgirl3 at 3:46 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • You don't hand out trust like candy... he has to EARN that trust. Stop beating yourself up...earning your trust is his job and it may take a long long time, but if he thinks you're worth it he'll do it.

    Answer by legalmommy101 at 3:59 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • You know, I wish I knew the answer. My DF has had two emotional affairs on me. . .last year. . .& I still am not in the place of trusting him. I wish I could help you more but I understand where you are.

    Answer by ColtsFan1912 at 4:11 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

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