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how do I let got of my babys dad??

me and my husband have been together for four years we had a 3 year old boy. We lost him to the system. My mom adopted him and im living with him! im his mommy. we used to do alot of bad drugs i got clean and john is just now getting clean and wants to see cameron and im like no no but inside im like I WANT YOU! okay! but i cant how do i keep my self strong/'

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Asked by CameronDMartin at 4:28 PM on Jan. 27, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (3)
  • I assume that since your mom has custody she ultimately has the final say? I would talk to her and see what kind if any conditions were put in place in order for her to maintain custody before making plans and have him talk to your mom about it. That way youre out of it entirely and can stay strong,.

    Answer by gemgem at 4:38 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • Talk to your mom about this and ask her to help you with "staying strong." I think it might be possible that if you can keep yourself clean and challenge John to do the same, you all might be able to have a future as a family. But he will have to prove himself, and that's where I think your mom can help you. If you have a goal and you stick to your plan to reach it, and if he wants the same thing as you do, challenge him to wait until everybody agrees he has proven himself. It could be a win/win situation for all of you.

    Answer by NannyB. at 4:41 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • You should probably wait until he is totally clean not trying to get clean. If he slips then you could be tempted and you would be back to square one. Sometimes we get into toxic relationships that are not good for us. Sometimes it is a relationship addiction (you understand the concept of addiction so know how dangerous that is). apart you may do well but together you might fall back into the routine. Wait until you both are stable and secure in your life.

    Answer by admckenzie at 5:33 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

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