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How can I teach my step-children to respect me?

Their father and I have been friends for several years, during which he had 3 children and I had 1 with our ex's. His ex is choosing drugs over their children and we now have custody and she is not even allowed visitation. We have had the children for 7 months and we are still having a hard time teaching them to respect me and the rules of our home. The oldest 2 are doing great in school. Their bio-mom never expected respect and let the kids do whatever and if they didnt get their way they learned to cry to get it. We are all seeing a counselor together and separate. We have rules and chore charts posted on the frig. Im so stressed out Im afraid Im getting depressed and Im at the point I dont want to do the everyday chores. I feel as though Im doing the things that HAVE to been done and nothing more. Im starting to fell like a failure. Does anyone have advise for a stressed out mother of 4 who is expecting another? Please help

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Asked by rionchoate at 8:32 PM on Jan. 27, 2009 in General Parenting

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Answers (2)
  • Does your husband respect you? (I'm saying that facisiously, I'm assuming he does). HE needs to SHOW them how he respects you, and HE needs to expect HIS children to respect you, and HE needs to teach HIS children to respect you. This falls on him.

    Answer by EireLass at 8:44 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

  • Huh - advice same as last time this question was answered. Get respect by showing respect. Also have a family meeting about discussing family rules and expectations as well as consequences when rules are not followed and expectations are not met. Check into family counseling that focuses on step-family relationships.

    Answer by JPsMommy605 at 9:19 PM on Jan. 27, 2009

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