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WHAT DO I DO AS A PARENT IF MY CHILD IS COMING HOME TELLING ME THAT KIDS AE TRYING TO FIGHT HER AT SCHOOL?

MY LITTLE GIRL CAME HOME TODAY AND TOLD ME THAT SOME KIDS WERE TRYING TO JUMP HER AT SCHOOL. HER CLASS WAS AT P.E. AND SOME KIDS STARTING PICKING MESS WITH MY CHILD AND THAT THEY STARTED HITTING HER AND TRYING TO PUSHING HER TO THE GROUND, AND SHE WENT TO THE TEACHER AND TOLD THE TEACHER AND THE SHE TOLD HER REGULAR TEACHER THAT IT WAS HER AND THAT THE OTHER GIRLS WERENT DOING HER ANYTHING. HER TEACHER WENT ON TO PUT MY CHILD IN THE CORNER FOR SOMETHING SHE DIDNT DO. IVE WENT UP TO THE SCHOOL AND TOLD THE PRINCIPAL AND THE TEACHERS ABOUT IT BEFORE WHEN THESE SAME LITTLE GIRLS STARTED WITH MY CHILD, THE PRINCIPAL PUT A STOP TO IT THEN AND NOW ITS HAPPENING ALL OVER AGAIN, WHAT DO I DO? WHAT DO I DO IF THE PEOPLE AT THE SCHOOL DONT WANT TO DO THEIR JOBS AND PROTECT MY BABY? HOW DO I NIP THIS IN THE BUD BEFORE SOMEONE REALLY GET HURT? PLEASE HELP ME IM A CONCERNED PARENT AND I REALLY NEED YOUR HELP WITH THIS TOPIC.

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MARTHAS507

Asked by MARTHAS507 at 12:15 AM on Jan. 28, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

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Answers (18)
  • I would make sure your daughter can defend herself just in case it does go too far, but make sure she knows not to fight unless she has to. Also tell the principal and the teacher if they dont do their jobs and protect your daughter they can expect a lawsuit...document all the times this has happend and if they dont stop it sue them. They need to protect your DD, and she has the right to go to school.
    Mikayla_lynn

    Answer by Mikayla_lynn at 12:23 AM on Jan. 28, 2009

  • I would suggest spending the day at the school. Sometimes you have to step in and make it known that this is not going to be allowed...in a nice way. One thing that alwyas works (based on age ofcourse) is setting up a conference with the parents of the other kids and the principal and teacher. Ive had to go through a few times and by the time the principal called all the kids in and threatened to contact parents we never had to go further. Bullying is not comfortable for a child and I would definitely be at the school ASAP. Let it be known that you are the parent of a child that they dont want to mess with. I would even be on the sidewalk in the evenings when the school let out after it has happened to watch my child and let it be seen by the other kids, I am not playing you will stop.
    VaDivaMom

    Answer by VaDivaMom at 12:53 AM on Jan. 28, 2009

  • Do have an one those school officers. If they do I would bringing it up their attention. Because if they are hitting her than that harrassment and abuse. They can get into trouble with the law for that. That's Pysical abuse. Its against the reguardless of the age where they are at. Next time this happens and no one does anything about it. Tell your daughter to walk out of class and demand to call you. You then call the Police and start pressing charges. I bet that would get the school attention in a hurry. I know people who this has happened to them.
    lesliekaym27

    Answer by lesliekaym27 at 12:54 AM on Jan. 28, 2009

  • ...My daughter was being bullied on the bus and it lead to a fight and suspension. Even after that the girl still picked on her. I left work early daily and was at the bus stop EVERY SINGLE DAY with hawk eyes on the girl and her "crew" and I made it known you got the wrong one. I even caught her mouthing to my daughter getting off the bus, when I rolled around the bus letting her know that she would need to go get a parent because it stops today and whatever was going to happen was going down in my presence right then and there, the girl walked up to my daughter and said hey we cool right I dont want no trouble! Kids pick on kids THEY KNOW THEY CAN PICK ON.
    VaDivaMom

    Answer by VaDivaMom at 12:57 AM on Jan. 28, 2009

  • I've always told my kids to stand up for themselves. Telling the teacher doesn't always work. My kids are not allowed to start a fight but they are allowed to finish it.
    sammiesmom2000

    Answer by sammiesmom2000 at 6:27 AM on Jan. 28, 2009

  • I'd go to the principal again, and tell him he needs to do his job and put a stop to it or you will be going to his boss. Also, teach your daughter how to defend herself. What I've always told my boys is: "You never, ever throw the first punch. If someone hits you and walks away, you go to your teacher, do not hit back. It's all on them. But if they hit you and they DO NOT walk away, you hit back until they back off." My boys have never been in a fight, but they understand under what circumstances they should hit back, and they know that I will come into that school and I will defend their right to defend themselves. Also, I agree with VaDiva about showing your presence. Kids pick on those they know are weak and won't fight back. They know that if you are there, your daughter will either fight back or have a witness, so they'll back off. Good luck!
    tropicalmama

    Answer by tropicalmama at 7:52 AM on Jan. 28, 2009

  • Call and speak to the principal and a few teachers, they can help make sure it doesn't happen or they can let you know if they think anything is going on. I had this happen once and I called the school and spoke to a teacher who said that she thought those girls were messing with my child, but they hadn't actually done anything physical, she just saw them around her but not like good friends talking. If you mention your concern they can at least help to keep her safe. Its hard with so many students and not enough teachers, but every bit helps. Teach her to also report every incident to the teacher. If they push her, or call her names, she needs to report it. That way either something can be said to the girls before a fight or if (God forbid) they fight it won't be her word against many girls because she will have built prior evidence to their harassment.
    seakla

    Answer by seakla at 8:09 AM on Jan. 28, 2009

  • Answered at 6:27 AM on Jan. 28, 2009 by: sammiesmom2000 I've always told my kids to stand up for themselves. Telling the teacher doesn't always work. My kids are not allowed to start a fight but they are allowed to finish it.


    This is what i tell mine too.  Don't throw the first punch, but throwm then when it comes to your defense.  I have even said that if they hit you once and keep on going just report it and if the teacher does nothing, report it to me.  But usually 9 times out of 10 that 1st hit wasn't seen but the victim's next one is.  So, I say let it go with just 1 hit, depending on how serious as well.  But if a 2nd one comes then fight back!

    seakla

    Answer by seakla at 8:11 AM on Jan. 28, 2009

  • I'm surprised no one mentions this, but this is a great time to incorporate a brother, cousin or friend a little bigger than they and tough, to ride bus or walk her home. kwim. Not to start anything but to let them know, otherwise if its me, I would have no patience with anyone messing w/my kid. My mouth will run off and off and that could be worse for the kid who goes back to school. But absolutely do something, its up to you to protect your child, and she/he needs you now.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:38 AM on Jan. 28, 2009

  • You go back to the principle and raise some hell and if that does no good you go to the superintendent of the school system in the county that you live in. I had to when my son was being bullied, by two boys in his class. I ended up telling my son if they start on you again to kick their butts and thats what he did. He got suspended for a day while the other two got a few days suspension. The bullies didn't stop so I sicked my husband on the principle and we threatened to call the police in order to get something done. They finally sent social services out to the boys' homes.
    Angie32Red

    Answer by Angie32Red at 8:39 AM on Jan. 28, 2009

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