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How would you feel?

My husband of 8 yrs is not really connecting with me lately. He has a lot of work stress-and he works midnights so when he's here, he sleeps of course. He is faithful to us-and I do know this for sure. But he just acts distant. He takes me for granted a lot. I am a stay at home mom who is always here-ya know? He isn't interested in sex-I think he is just so unhappy with himself that he isn't enjoying life at all. We have talked about it-alot, but things don't get any better. I feel lonely and I want the excitement of the relationship-is it normal for me to want to "look around"?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:30 AM on Jan. 28, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (4)
  • God you sound like me... my hubby and I have been together for 11 years... have 2 kids and are in the same exact situation. He started working nights and I feel like it all went down hill. Is it normal for your eye to stray? I think so... you want and need stimulation/affection! But SHOULD you look? No... Keep talking to him. See what is at the root of his problem, try not to get upset. Our sex life did get better, we just had to get over a stressful hump (no pun intended). Stay positive! good luck
    LuvnIt2

    Answer by LuvnIt2 at 12:35 AM on Jan. 28, 2009

  • No its not normal for you to look around if you want to stay married. It's normal if you want to start down the road of infidelity and divorce.
    If he's working hard for you so you can stay home I think you've got to stick this through. Maybe he's not giving his 100% but marriages go through those stages sometimes. Its not always going to be exciting.
    MamaChamp

    Answer by MamaChamp at 12:36 AM on Jan. 28, 2009

  • It is normal for you to look around, you are only human. But just make sure you don't act on it! You two need to find a way to reconnect, make an effort! Try the usual weekly "date night", or if no babysitter, just a movie night once the kids are in bed weekly, or a no-tv- just back-massages night. There is also a great series of books (that can be hard to find) that you can get in some of the big book stores. They are called "IF....". They are just books of all kinds of questions under the sun that may help you connect.

    Also, have your hubby checked out for depression! You'd be surprised the world of difference some ttreatment could make if that is the problelm.
    Turtle207

    Answer by Turtle207 at 12:59 AM on Jan. 28, 2009

  • Oh yeah, the books are small and usually in the self help section.
    Turtle207

    Answer by Turtle207 at 1:00 AM on Jan. 28, 2009

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