Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

after 15 years of marriage, my husband - who is a great provider and fantastic father to our 11yr daughter, has no sex drive towards me. but he will still give me kiss every morning before leaving for work and sometimes when he comes home from work. what should i do??

Answer Question

Asked by aqua0264 at 5:37 PM on Jun. 19, 2008 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • You need to discuss the problem with him. Let him know if there is anything you can do. Be kind and understanding. Maybe he is stressed. Find out from him. Be more open with him about your needs.

    Answer by greatmomandwife at 5:43 PM on Jun. 19, 2008

  • You may need to get really creative like watch a dirty movie or go to a hotel. Maybe go to a strip club together or give him his own private show at home. Men need visual stimulation I think after a long relationship. Also your daughter is at an age wher him may be uncomfortable at home in case she hears you. Get a sitter and buy some sexy lingre on-line have it overnighted to the house in a box addresed to him when he gets home ,with a bow on top.

    Answer by natenally at 5:44 PM on Jun. 19, 2008

  • Sometimes in marriage we can get "comfortable" and that can be a bad thing. Maybe he's not interested because he thinks you aren't interested. You can't sit around and wait for him to change, you need to take the initiative and make a change in yourself. Start off by showing him more affection, don't wait for him to kiss you, you go kiss him. When you are sitting on the couch watching TV or whatever try sitting a little closer than normal and hold his hand. Tell him that you appreciate him and make him feel like a man. I'm telling you, it works wonders with my husband! Also, you might want to read Dr. Laura's book, The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands.

    Answer by MomDom03 at 5:55 PM on Jun. 19, 2008

  • One thing I leaned to do when the sex life started fading is to be spontanious!!! One night when you go to bed wear a sexy little nighty to bed, light some candles, put on some good music. I know it all sounds a little cheesy, but I promise it works. Men are men and when they see something like that it triggers something. They think back when the sex was still alive. Trust me I did this when I was 6 months pregnant and it worked!!! Give it a try

    Answer by Crystal0820 at 8:24 PM on Jun. 19, 2008

  • First tell him how you feel and what you need from him. If he refuses then I would fill that void as best i can. I suggest an online friendship. I have a group for cyber-affairs. I don't think of them as cheating but that's just me. They fill a void and in my opinion they can enhance a marriage.

    Answer by admckenzie at 8:34 PM on Jul. 26, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.