Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

should i feel like this?

I am super confused! i just had a baby 3 weeks ago with my ex boyfriend and he has been around alot. the other night he came by to see our daughter and my mom went off on him. why do i feel like i want him even more than i did? Is it because i know that its like a "forbidden" thing. he says he is not interested in me, but he pays more attention to me than his daughter when he is around.. i know im reading more into it than i should, but i really want him and it got worse after the babies birth and the other scenario

Answer Question
 
sunshinebaby209

Asked by sunshinebaby209 at 5:34 PM on Jan. 28, 2009 in Relationships

Level 10 (412 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • If he doesn't want you, you are reading more into his attention than you should. It may be a case of the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence- in both directions. He may enjoy flirting, and you with your hormones recovering from pregnancy and your self-esteem maybe not as high as it could be post partum maybe be enjoying the attention, the fact that you know better makes it all the more alluring.
    Bmat

    Answer by Bmat at 5:38 PM on Jan. 28, 2009

  • I think it could be your hormones, too. After I had my daughter, I would look at my husband and wonder how I could love him more than I did when we first got married. This is the same man who I was irritated with because he didn't want to have sex with me being big & pregnant! LOL..I think it could be the "forbidden" thing, but you just had a baby & he is the father. Make sense?
    themacs4

    Answer by themacs4 at 5:39 PM on Jan. 28, 2009

  • yeah it makes sense.. i was feeling the feelings for him all along, it just got worse after everything. and both of your answers make sense.. i know i was reading into it more than i should, but i guess i wish i wasnt.
    sunshinebaby209

    Answer by sunshinebaby209 at 5:41 PM on Jan. 28, 2009

  • You want him because you just had his child and you want it to work and be a family. If he doesnt want you though you need to keep reminding yoursef of that along with why he is the ex.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 5:45 PM on Jan. 28, 2009

  • Just Remember An Ex Is An Ex For A Reason. Good Luck. Oh And Congrats On Your LO
    Kari_Noelle

    Answer by Kari_Noelle at 8:04 PM on Jan. 28, 2009

  • It is possible he pays more attention to your daughter simply because of her age. If you live with your mom or she is able to be there when he visits you should leave the room during his visits. Take a nap, catch up on email or even leave the house if you feel like doing so. This will do two things. 1st, it will help you distance yourself from him. This might allow you to get past the relationship easier. 2nd, if your hopes are right and not just hopes, he will have to request to spend more time with you if he really wants to. The 2nd will also help with the 1st, if he doesn't ask for more time with you it is a sure sign to move on.
    its4sandra

    Answer by its4sandra at 2:15 AM on Jan. 29, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN