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"The Special Mother"
Most women become mothers by accident, some by choice, a few by social pressure and a couple by habit. This year, nearly 100,000 women will become mothers of special needs children. Did you ever wonder how these mothers are chosen? Somehow, I visualize God hovering over Earth, selecting his instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation. As he observes, he instructs his angels to take notes in a giant leger.
"Armstrong, Beth: Son. Patron Saint: Matthew.
Forrest, Marge: Daughter. Patron Saint: Celia.
Rutledge, Carrie: Twins, sons. Patron Saint... Give her Gerard, he's used to profanity."
Finally, he passes a name to an angel and smiles. "Give her a special needs child."
The angel is curious. "Why this one? She's so happy!"
"Exactly," smiles God. "Could I give a special needs child to a mother who knows no laughter? That would be cruel."
"But does she have the patience?" asks the angel.
"I don't want her to have too much patience, or she'll drown in a sea of self-pity and despair. Once the shock and resentment wear off, she'll handle this well. I watched her today. She has that sense of self and independence so rare and so necessary in a mother. You see, the child I'm going to give her has a world of its' own. She has to teach it to live in her world, and that's not going to be easy."
"But Lord, I don't think she even believes in you."
God smiles. "No matter. This one is perfect. She has just enough selfishness."
The angel gasps. "Selfishness? Is that a virtue?"
God nods. "It is here. If she can't seperate herself from the child occasionally, she will never survive. Yes, here is a woman who I will bless. She doesn't know it yet, but she is to be envied. She will never take for granted a spoken word. She will never consider a step ordinary. When her child says 'Mama' for the first time, she will be witness to a miracle, and know it. I will permit her to see clearly the things I see- ignorance, cruelty, prejudice- and allow her to rise above them. She will never be alone. I will be at her side every minute of every day of her her life, whether she knows me or not, because she is doing my work as surely as if she were here by my side."
"And what about the patron saint?" asks the angel, pen poised in the air. God smiles.
"A mirror will suffice."
This was given to me by a Neonatal ICU nurse named Alicia the day my daughter was born. Alicia brought me some medicine to calm the panic attack I had on hearing how servere my Victoria's disabilities were likely to be. She sat with Victoria's father and myself, and let us cry. Then, she brought me a print out of this prose. Alicia told me that she had a special needs child, & that her nurse had given it to her on the day her daughter was diagnosed. I framed it, and it sits on my vanity table. I'm not sure where it originally came from, but I hope that you'll print it, maybe share it, if it brings you a smile as it does me. You are all wonderful mothers, & I'm happy CM is here so I can know you.
I really needed this. I just got back from having dinner with a friend and I felt a bit guilty.
Answer by JeremysMom at 11:32 PM on May. 22, 2012
Answer by fiatpax at 11:48 PM on May. 22, 2012
Answer by kmath at 12:00 AM on May. 23, 2012
Answer by iwicked at 11:42 PM on May. 22, 2012
Answer by Mme.Langley at 11:54 PM on May. 22, 2012
Answer by PMSMom10 at 1:41 AM on May. 23, 2012
Answer by winterglow at 4:44 AM on May. 23, 2012
An amazing post and kudos to the original author. Every mother can take something from that piece.
Answer by tasches at 7:53 PM on May. 23, 2012
Answer by RobinChristine at 12:23 AM on May. 24, 2012