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Annoyed Almost Beyond Repair

My husband is always there to give his son whatever he wants when he wants it. He even gives him things the rest of the family likes, for instance my chicken & BBQ sauce, my daughter's applesauce or juice. My husband always tells us, "I will buy you more tomorrow." But he always takes a while to replace our things.

I'm so sick of my husband giving his son whatever he wants when he want sit! His son is so spoiled and my husband doesn't even believe it!!!! AGHHHHHH!!!!

How do I stop this? How can I fix this?

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SeedsOfLove

Asked by SeedsOfLove at 11:13 AM on Jan. 29, 2009 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (32)
  • I want you to be totally honest with yourself.......dont get mad. Be honest. IF the tables were turned........what would you do? Be honest. How you feel right now doesnt count. Think about if you were in your husbands shoes and it was your son.
    mistynights234

    Answer by mistynights234 at 11:15 AM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • your HUSBANDS son is your son to? if it's for your kids then it shouldn't matter as long as he's not taking it out of your hands to give to him i don't see anything wrong.
    watersgirls

    Answer by watersgirls at 11:16 AM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • Have you tried talking to him calmly about it? Sometimes there's not much you can do, my sis went through the same thing her stepson was a big crybaby, and it started causing problems with her and her husband cuz he would get mad at my sister for getting after him. He eventually grew out of it, but if you can't wait that long maybe just have extra snack on hand for him so your husband doesn't give him you or your daughters stuff.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:19 AM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • Well to be honest, if you only got to see your children for a few days a week, would you not want to spoil them? and he DOES replace the things he uses, even if it takes awhile. I don't really think you are being fair to his son, by acting like he should be excluded. A better way to solve this issue is NOT by putting down rules for things like you said because you will only push hubby and his son farther away. Instead, try including them, and acting like they are both part of the family. A marriage is about give and take. It doesn't sound like your giving a lot of affection to his son, and he was part of the package. So you need to really assess where you stand on this. If you can't support how he treats his son, then how can you support your husband on anything? See my point?
    xxhazeldovexx

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 11:34 AM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • cont. and in all honestly, i would be happy to have a husband that has such obvious love toward his son... there are a lot of fathers that don't.
    xxhazeldovexx

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 11:35 AM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • Sometimes parents splitting time with kids want to make up for it ... it is not bad as long the child is learning responsiblity and also learning discipline. I do the same because he is a living doll! I love to spoil him. I can't help but feel sorry for the fact that I can't be there for him and his step mom is out of control yelling at him for no good reason. There is nothing I can do about that either. Why is this being taken out on the child? What did he do? He did not ask to be put in that situation. If you can't stand people taking your things you should look at why? Why are you living with people that you don't want to share with ... what does that say about you. I am sorry you don't have perspective on this. I am also sorry for all the sad and lonely kids out there that don't understand why they get screamed at for no reason from the step moms. I would try to understand the child and know that they are all different.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:58 AM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • I understand where you are coming from. I have been seeing someone who doesnt discipline his daughter. She whines and gets her way constantly and I make my daughter mind. Now the girls are having problems getting along because he doesn't make his daughter mind and hates to see her upset. I think it is disgusting and I may just walk away from a great guy cause it is not fair to my daughter. On the way home the other day my daughter said she thinks her friend is really whiny and she thinks whining works at there house. She can clearly see what is happening.
    ria7

    Answer by ria7 at 12:04 PM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • Sorry, you can't change him because you do not have the power. I guess you could lock your stuff up and not give him a key.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 12:21 PM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • First and Foremost, I understand compeltely what you are going through. Believe me! There was a time to where I was in the exact same position with my SS. At the time, my heart was filled with jelousy and hatered towards him. Every weekend, the entire time, my SO revolved his world around his DS. I didnt understand it at first, but now I do. My SO rarely is able to see his son, and all my SO wants to do is make him feel comfortable and loved when he is at our house. All of the things that your are concerned about remember, they are all materialistic things that are able to be bought again. Start showing your SO's DS with the same attention, and see how much better you feel!
    leighannarobey

    Answer by leighannarobey at 12:56 PM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • why do you say HIS son? okay so he's your stepson.. why does the household have to be so divided?
    Kelly_Ann

    Answer by Kelly_Ann at 1:48 PM on Jan. 29, 2009

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