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What would you do if your child told you....

leave me alone Mommy! I'm getting tired of you....

He's 5 and told me this on the train this morning because I was nagging him about keeping still. He was fidgeting and kept leaning onto the woman sitting next to him. I told him that it wasn't a very nice thing to say. And when we got off I sat him down and asked him if he would like if I went away and he never saw me again. Of course he got sad and said No...I told him that he hurt my feelings and he said Sorry Mommy :-(

Answer Question
 
NJMom2Tyler

Asked by NJMom2Tyler at 12:04 PM on Jan. 29, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 1 (-15 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • Awe, how sweet he apologized. I wouldn't make a big deal out of it, he's just 5. It was good that you explained it wasn't nice and he hurt your feelings. I think that was a good course of action. Keep up the good parenting mama!
    navy-wife

    Answer by navy-wife at 12:07 PM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • He's just a kid being a kid. Does he go to school or a sitter? I'll bet it something he's heard another kid say when someone annoyed them and so he said it to you. I think the way you handled it is fine. My son told me once he didn't want to live with me anymore. So, I told him fine, then you can get your stuff and go live with your grandparents, if that's really what you want. That changed his mind real quick. Kids often don't realize that what they say can hurt our feelings. They are thinking of how they feel, so they say whatever they say and don't think about how it might make us feel.
    tropicalmama

    Answer by tropicalmama at 12:15 PM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • kids say things that hurt because they don't realize words can hurt. Sounds like you handled it really well and he knew to apologize. Keep your head up!
    momof3jll

    Answer by momof3jll at 12:19 PM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • I'm just sitting her picturing all of this, and it's so cute I had to giggle, in spite of myself. They are so cute. Like everyone else said, don't worry about it, he's just 5. You handled it well.
    sfwilson

    Answer by sfwilson at 12:55 PM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • I think you handled the situation in a good way. He was bothered with you telling him to keep still, he does not know how to articulate his words so he just flat out said how he was feeling at that moment. He did say sorry and you did explained how it hurtyour feelings.  When my daughter was 4 we were walking to the park, my daughter got angry with me because I asked her to stop dragging her sweater.  She told me that she was not my mommy anymore!  I just kept on walking, she followed calling mommy, I paid not attention to her.  She started to cry ran up to me and said mommy I am talking to you.  I looked around and said well you told me I was not your mommy anymore. Then I told her she hurt my feelings no matter what I will always love her and be her mommy.   I know I was a bit immature!!

    mommiedear

    Answer by mommiedear at 1:19 PM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • hm... personally I wouldn't offer to go away simply because my kids would say ok bye...

    either way sounds like you have a sweet lil guy there
    LuckyClown

    Answer by LuckyClown at 1:45 PM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • LOL...Thanks everyone for the answers. I found it kind of cute and funny myself when he said that. These kids are a trip!!

    NJMom2Tyler

    Answer by NJMom2Tyler at 2:05 PM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • Hey, they are kids, but they are people just like us. THey get annoyed. My five year old has done the same thing to me, and I tried to take the hint, and nag differently. I have a new weapon, and it's nagging with a smile, and silly names. "Hey there, silly head, why's your coat on the floor? Think I won't know who did it, kiddo?" Sometimes it works better, when people are around, so he doesn't feel like I'm 'mommy whipping' him, and making him feel embarrassed. But, yeah, I told him that I was hurt when he said he was tired of me, and I should quit bugging him all the time. He understood.
    McGregor

    Answer by McGregor at 6:54 PM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • Awww! He sounds like he's a real sweetie. The fact that he felt comfortable enough with you to try to tell you you were getting on his nerves says a lot about your relationship. It sounds like you are probably very close.

    If my child said that to me I would probably let it go until later on when we were both calm, and then I would have asked him about it. If he wanted to talk about it we would, but if he had already moved on I would just let it go. As others have already said, he was just expressing his frustration in a very 5 year old manner. And being able to express how he feels is a *good* thing! I might tell my child that if he or she is frustrated with me, I would understand better if they simply said "Mom, I'm getting frustrated with you" though.
    jessradtke

    Answer by jessradtke at 9:34 PM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • Somebody said that to him. He didn't invent that combination of words. Remember how funny it was and let go of the hurt.
    LeftBrainy

    Answer by LeftBrainy at 9:43 PM on Jan. 29, 2009

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