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How does anyone handle this?

Ok, I am over 35, have had several children...I still wear a size 7/8, and am very athletic, tall, blonde...have never had any cosmetic work done. I had 4 older brothers, no sisters, so dealing with woman can become an issue for me.
But how many have ever had to deal with other women and thier ability to accuse you of being rude when you are not, snobby when you would not even know where to begin to be that way? I even went out of my way to tell a lady I had never met before that her hair looked great, and asked where she gets it done! Still like in high school..".he said, that she said you were rude to her"



Asked by Anonymous at 12:47 PM on Jan. 29, 2009 in Beauty & Style

This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • Living in a small town and not being from that small town could be 90% of your problem. I come from a small town. Women in small towns are the worst because they are used to each other and may see you as an "outsider", especially if that outsider is from a big city (don't know if you are). If that is the case, you will just have to give them time to warm up to you. You could participate in local activities, volunteer around the community, etc. and give them a chance to get to know you for who you are and not what you look like. Don't change who you are to please them, just give them a chance to get to know you. If they cannot except you for who you are, they are not worth being friends with. Women in small communities, especially if it's an everybody-knows-everybody-else town are very judgemental and feel threatened if someone they don't know suddenly comes along. Don't ask me why, I have one younger brother and grew up in BFE

    Answer by Lethal232 at 8:06 PM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • women suck! thats how they all are. they neverr grow up! you learn to just ignore it and dont even bother. and dont let it get to you. its not like they matter. ive learned this and it makes life a lot easier when you accept that women are horribly catty and they will never change!!

    Answer by Amanduhpanda at 12:49 PM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • If you can't get along with 51% of the population - the problem might be YOU.

    Ok, you only had brothers - big deal.

    Ok, you're in great shape - big deal.

    You need to learn to check your ego at the door, watch your tone, and be geniunely interested in other people. If you find a woman you'd like to be friends with - be honest! Say you don't have a lot of experience with friendships.

    I must admit, I've never understood women who don't like other women. I will take a complex, crazy, committed friendship with a woman over any man, any day (except for my DH - he's awesome). My friends are my pack and I would defend any of them, because they are my kind of crazy.


    Answer by Wimsey at 1:04 PM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • That is too bad. It hurts to be accused of rudeness when you are only trying to be friendly. I guess in the future don't ask where a person gets their hair done or buys something. It is usually safe to say how nice her hair looks or what a pretty or flattering dress. Don't let one snippy woman put you off, continue to be smile and be nice.

    Answer by Bmat at 1:05 PM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • I'm with Wimsey on this one. It reminds me of the episode of the Tyra show on earlier this week. If you didn't see it, this is pretty much how it went...there was a beautiful woman, she claimed to be soooo nice, but couldn't keep female friends. She figured it was because other women were jealous of her good looks...dig a little deeper and the underlying issue was that she felt like other women SHOULD be jealous of her. She was all too aware of her physical attractiveness and didn't treat others with the same regard with which she held herself. She made otehr women uneasy because she came across as self-involved. There is no room for ego in friendships with women. We all have insecurities of our own, so nobody wants to be friends with the woman who thinks she is perfect.

    Answer by Danielle720 at 1:12 PM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • Maybe you come off that way without meaning too. I'd ask someone straight up if that's how you come off. If they say no you don't act like a snob then it's the other women. I don't see why you felt the need to explain how good you look before you asked your question. I don't discriminate against attractive women. I have many friends who are better lookin then me but then again they don't walk around reciting their measurements.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:42 PM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • I explained how I look as I believe it to be part of the problem. I also am not from this small town, and yet married one that is.I work VERY hard to stay in shape, but it is not what I live to do...I love my many children and family life. Having brothers is part of it also, I just do not think I have the same issues that a lot of women have because of being around the guys! I did not say I was goodlooking at all...just my genereal appearance is what I described...if some believe that to be goodlooking, than I guess people do judge you from what they see or read.. even by just typing in these words, and not meeting now I can draw the conclusion that most posters here assume I am goodlooking and must know it based on my description! sad:(

    Answer by dhoppe at 2:23 PM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • guess I am not ? any longer, forgot to check the box..LOL

    Answer by dhoppe at 2:34 PM on Jan. 29, 2009

  • Well, I guess it is about hlf/half...people DO judge you based on how you look, or describe yourself...if I had described myself as being short, overweight, and out of shape....would that be considered Goodlookin? It is sad that people assume or judge based on looks..., . I am a christian, I do not see color, shape size etc.. I look at what is inside, not everyone can see past what is on the outside to even give someone a chance..Not having been around a lot of girls growing up also hs left me not understanding the need to be "pretty" . Also living in a small town I am not from I am sure plays a role. Thank you for your answers.

    Answer by dhoppe at 10:17 AM on Jan. 30, 2009