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HOW CAN WE GET OUR 3 YEAR OLD SON TO "TELL US" WHEN HE HAS TO PEE OR POOP AND "SIT" ON HIS POTTY CHAIR?

First of all our son is a "late talker" and therefor does not speak fluent sentences yet. He knows how to say pee, poop, potty, etc. and even knows sign language. We have tried three times off and on the past 9 months to potty train our 3 year old son. Each time has been VERY tramatizing for him to even be PUT on any type of potty chair. We have tried everything from the big boy potty with the padded seat to two of his own potty chairs, books, videos, songs, sickers, charts, rewards, etc. We have even tried to tell him how 'YUCKY" it is to go pee and poop in his Cotton training pants. We've used cool alert & regular pull ups, and Cotton training pants. He is very regular and knows when he goes pee and poop. We don't understand why he doesn't want to sit on any potty's. He WILL stand next to daddy and watch but will not participate except for toilet paper and flushing. Please HELP! I feel I am letting him down.

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HONEYGIRL45

Asked by HONEYGIRL45 at 5:29 AM on Jan. 30, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

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Answers (7)
  • My son loves wrestling ... sooo i bought him a wrestling belt ... and told him 'big boys' get to win the belt ... so he went in the potty for a week and 'won' it ... than wen he had an accident that he didnt tell me about , he lost it ... i also bought like a few mathbox cars and told him hed get them wen he proves to b a big boy ... he quickly went
    tha-hawt-mommie

    Answer by tha-hawt-mommie at 8:35 AM on Jan. 30, 2009

  • Oh...youre not letting him down. Hes just a late bloomer. Its not that he doesn't get it because he obviously does, but its more the emotionaly maturity. I have the same kinda kid. He will be 3 in April and he will even pee on the potty but he will not poop and screams if I try to make him sit. He can come tell me that he stinks and that he pooped but when I ask him about going on the potty, he says NO, I pee. Basically hes willing to only pee but not poop on the potty. Keep encouraging him and rewarding him ( a little bribery never hurt...lol) but don't push. Its not at all uncommon for boys to be 3 1/2 to 4 before getting it down and maturing enough to do it. Don't be too hard on yourself either. Its not something you can control and he KNOWS that. Kids are smart. Just be patient with him.....he will NOT go to Kindergarten unpotty trained. It will come!
    momofsaee

    Answer by momofsaee at 9:19 AM on Jan. 30, 2009

  • Be patient - he will go on the potty when he's ready. But as for letting you know, WATCH his body language and learn when he has to go. My son would grab his crotch when he had to go - it was like an automatic response to the need to pee...as soon as I saw that, I would call his attention to the need to go. I learned the hard way to NOT ask him if he needs to go but rather to just TELL him he needs to go. So watch his body language - that should tell you more than words when he needs to go, and then you can use that as a prompt. Also, remember that potty learning is a control issue - and something that only he can control. Go with his schedule and encourage him whenever you can, find what will make him WANT to go (an incentive is not a bribe), but never push - this has to be his choice so he can take this huge step to independence. Good luck!
    JPsMommy605

    Answer by JPsMommy605 at 10:22 AM on Jan. 30, 2009

  • He may not be as ready as you are.Sme kids take extra time.But if thats not the case I tried ullup,cotton padded undies,NOTHING WORKED,so I Knew he didnt like to bedirty(diaper drty WE clean) put him in regular Hanes undies and for about a week ,it was pretty messy but he did get the hang of it soon enugh.Just buy about 3 packs if you try this(so u dont have to wash the realy bad ones:)And yes still do rewards and stuff like that just do the REAL undie thing(it works).
    The_ME_Trilogy

    Answer by The_ME_Trilogy at 1:15 PM on Jan. 30, 2009

  • My son just turned 3 in December, and he just started going on the potty yesterday!!! When he was a little over 2 he started to 'feel' when he had to go; so we bought all the pottys, the insert for the big toilet, a stool, and everything else that is out there to try with. After a few months of frustration on both out parts I said to myself, this is nuts when he's ready to go he'll go. I would offer him the potty; he would go randomly, but he had to be on the regular toilet, staning up, facing the back. Hardly the safest way to go to the potty. Yesterday I said to him, you are getting ot be a very big boy, and in order to do big boy things you can not wear a diaper anymore. He said, Let's try mommy. So, everytime he pees on the potty he gets a sugar free organic lollipop and for every day that we have no accidents, we get to go the the deli and get a donut. This is only day 2 but it is working.
    ksquarednlove

    Answer by ksquarednlove at 5:04 PM on Jan. 30, 2009

  • Part 2: I kept him with no pants on (except when we went out of course) and put a diapre on for at night. I have a feeling it's going to be a long process. My ped. says boys are harder and to try not to make an issue out of it.

    Don't beat yourself up mom...like my grandma always says (and she raised 9 kids), they won't to college in there diapers!!!

    Good luck!!
    ksquarednlove

    Answer by ksquarednlove at 5:06 PM on Jan. 30, 2009

  • Being the mother-figure for my 3 year old grandson, I resorted to bribery when he showed no interest in potty training at 3 1/2. i recently purchased a small bubblegum machine. He gets 1 penny to put in the bubble gum machine for pee and 2 pennies for the machine for poop. After 2 weeks, he rarely pees in his big boy pants but poop is usually not on his radar so far. I might have to find a better bribe.
    pooped-out

    Answer by pooped-out at 7:04 PM on Jan. 30, 2009

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