Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

I need help!

My two year old is SO bad and out of control. I've tried everything to break him of his whining and not listening. Everytime he is about to do something wrong, I tell him no and he turns right around and does it anyways! I've smacked his butt and fingers, put him on time out, etc etc. He just does it anyways and I hate yelling at him but I don't know what else to do! I can't take it. It makes me even more mad when he turns into an Angel when Dad comes home. I'm tired, way pregnant and have not enough patience right now. What can I do? ( I know, welcome to the twos... but just help!)

Answer Question

Asked by AshJoe05 at 4:24 PM on Jan. 30, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 17 (3,651 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • You need to childproof your house first. Put away everything that he can get into and make is much harder for him to do anything wrong. I know a lot of people don't believe in this, but it will make it easier. Second, praise praise praise everything he does right. Third, lighten up and have some fun. Get him out of the house. Put him on a schedule. No yelling, not smacking, no timeouts. Make it so that he really cannot get into trouble and praise everything he does that's good. He will get better.

    Answer by kemclaughlin at 4:34 PM on Jan. 30, 2009

  • Try distracting him with another object or activity..meaning if he is going to play with something that he shouldn't, tell him "no" and then suggest he do something else. Stay firm in your punishment and "no". Praise him for good behavior.
    Does he snore when he sleeps? Some children's behavior is linked to snoring. Most ppl don't know it. snoring = sleep apnea = restless night = moody during waking hours.

    Answer by Dani32 at 4:35 PM on Jan. 30, 2009

  • Well, first, let me say this - two year olds lack the impulse control to necessarily remember the rules right away or respond to your direction. Be proactive with him. Don't yell. Don't spank. Speak firmly "No! Do not touch." Then redirect and distract. Don't hit his hand, move his hand off what he's reaching for and then offer an alternative.

    Kids hear "no" a lot and they start to tune out all the "don't", "you can't" "no" - try telling him what he can do. "No. Do not touch the picture frame. Come to me. I'll hold it and we can look at it together."

    The whining? That's part of being a toddler - not something to encourage, but honestly, he's a little baby still. It's normal. Don't give in to the whines. Respond with "I can't help you when you talk like that. When you can use your nice voice and talk to me like a big boy, I can help you."

    Answer by ldmrmom at 4:37 PM on Jan. 30, 2009

  • Instead of telling him "no" when you can see he's about to do something naughty, try redirecting his attention. Say "hey, let's play with this truck" or something to that effect.

    He's young to understand time out but you can still use it for serious offenses (you'll just have to sit with him). Say "No ___" then take him into another room. Say "I"m putting you in time out for ___" then sit him down and sit with him (but try not to face him directly) for as close to two minutes as you can get then repeat "No ___" give him a kiss and move on.
    Whining and not listening come with the territory. When he whines say to him "use your words, no whining" "mommy can't understand you when you whine, try again". Be consistent and he'll get it.
    When he's not listening, count to three and if he's not responding by two, go to him and help him do what it is you're asking of him.

    Answer by twinclubmom at 8:07 PM on Jan. 30, 2009

  • My son ignores "no" when he wants attention. If we are interacting and I say "no" he listens quite well. But, if I'm on the phone or trying to read something then I could say "no" until I'm blue in the face. I usually just put down what I'm doing and redirect him. I'll play with him for a minute and then finish what I need to do. It's frustrating but they don't have the ablity to control their impulses at this age. Maybe that's why they are called the terrible twos... it's terrible that they can't control themselves, lol!

    Answer by Vespa at 10:41 PM on Jan. 30, 2009

  • YOURS TOO? My son is two and sometimes I feel like hes an out of control teenager. LOL . He just does whatever he want. When I try to tell him no and that what hes doing is not okay or not nice, he smacks me , hits me , pulls my hair or pulls my glasses off. I dont want to smack his little butt. But I do put him in time out and i tell him no. He just ignored me. And goes right back to doing what he was doing. I NEVER imagined terrible twos to be like this. But he is so good for his dad. But as soon as his daddy walks out that door to go to work, you can bet hes right back to his old ways!!!! I just dont know what to do. So I need help with this also!

    Answer by JmgBlair at 10:39 PM on Jan. 31, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.