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38y.o. mom of 2 considering to join the Navy Reserve

I am a permanent resident considering joining the US Navy Reserve. I am happily married to an Army Veteran and we have 2 precious daughters (5y.o and 2y.o.).

I feel there is no sense in asking whether or not I am deployed, to serve the country implies it. However, considering Obama's dream to end war, what are the real chances of me being deployed over 6 months after PT and AT and/or how many 6+ mo deployments should I expect in the 6 year contract?

On the other hand, I am getting the feeling that because of my age, “permanent resident” status the "training" or type of jobs available for me would not be those which training could really make a difference in the future of my family and so worth the sacrifice. I wonder if anyone else my age is considering to join or have already done so or if you know another mom currently in service and their experiences may be.

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Asked by Braveheart09 at 8:08 PM on Jan. 30, 2009 in Money & Work

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Answers (14)
  • I think going and talking to a Navy recruiter would be best, they will have all the information that you need. Or i'm sure there is probably a group for enlisted Navy personnel on here somewhere, that could help you out as well.

    Answer by smnice at 8:11 PM on Jan. 30, 2009

  • I can't imagine joining the reserves at any age when I have kids to care for. I know the money sounds good but there are no promises with the Obama plan. Even if he can bring our troops home, it will be a long process and someone will have to replace them. My hubby was Navy for 6years, he did one 6mth tour but that's because he got lucky and got put on a ship when it was in for refueling. I hated the military life...I would NEVER recommend it for anyone is married and/or has kids.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:14 PM on Jan. 30, 2009

  • Well, I would ask these questions to my rec officer, unfortunately, their priorities affect their ability to tell "the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth" and for us moms it is crucial to know what or what not to expect.

    Answer by Braveheart09 at 8:15 PM on Jan. 30, 2009

  • I am a military mom, it's really not that bad. It just takes some extra mommy effort, thats all. You can get the job info etc. from your recruiter. But like I say I would try to find a group on here or just any person in the Navy who can fill you in some more. I am not Navy so I feel if I give you more than that I could be misleading because I don't know 100% how the Navy works. Also I have met alot of older women that are in the Navy, your options are still there.

    Answer by smnice at 8:20 PM on Jan. 30, 2009

  • Regarding "joining the reserves at any age when I have kids to care for" my husband is a proud Army Veteran himself (honorably discharged over 20 years ago) and not only he supports my decision but his current occupation allows him to stay home with the kids 80% of the time, so it is not like I am abandoning them or putting them in second place.

    I do not understand why if it is a man the one willing and able to go, that is judge as a very honorable/normal thing to do, a decision that does not make him any less of a good father to his kids while for a woman (still today in the twenty first century) the matter is judge in a totally different way?

    Answer by Braveheart09 at 8:33 PM on Jan. 30, 2009

  • Ya know, i think the same thing. But even though people like to say times have change, in some ways they really haven't. Like when my mom tells people that I'm in the Marine Corps, their first response to her is "Oh, where is your SON stationed at? Drives her nuts! me too! Good luck on your journey and I hope you succeed at whatever you decide to do.

    Answer by smnice at 8:38 PM on Jan. 30, 2009

  • SMnice. It is good to know there are other moms in service ;) I prepared a pack of questions to the rec officer filling in for the one I had who is currently in leave. Hopefully I will get this one to tell me the things I need to know.

    Answer by Braveheart09 at 8:39 PM on Jan. 30, 2009

  • I do not know about others but in my case if something happens to my husband (God forbidden), my kids only got me, and I only got me too (all my family live abroad and they barely make it to survive themselves). That is why I need to find a way to work and get trained instead of working only, and the armed forces are the only ones willing and able to keep you at your best physically and professionally speaking. Yes, it may hurt to miss time with my babies while they are still growing up, but it will hurt us all way more if am not ready/capable to provide for them when it is needede and to me "oh I never dared to pursue a career cause I could not leave you not even for 4-6 months" it is not an acceptable excuse.

    Answer by Braveheart09 at 8:58 PM on Jan. 30, 2009

  • Braveheart I wish you the best! I fully understand your reasons behind wanting to join the Navy Reserves. I hope you find the answers that you are looking for and are able to join.

    Answer by Magpie75 at 1:25 AM on Jan. 31, 2009

  • I thought the military had an age cut-off to join? 35 or something like that? Have you actually talked to a recruiter, yet?

    Answer by TeensMom07 at 5:55 AM on Jan. 31, 2009

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