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Was it hard to adjust to married life?

My husband and I have been married for a litle over a year now. We got married two months before he deployed for Afghanistan. We just had a baby three months ago, and we have been living together for two months. I feel like we are always bickering at each other. Maybe we are just stressed from living together for the first time and being parents. Any suggestions?


Asked by Anonymous at 12:07 AM on Feb. 1, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • sort of bit off a whole lot of major life changes all at once in your relationship. You get married, two months later he's deployed. You have a baby and then you finally get to start living together. I'd say bickering is probably normal at this point. Marriage is a huge thing by itself and you guys had a lot more to deal with on top of that. Not to say that marriage is bad. I've been married for 11 years now. Honestly, we fought like crazy at the beginning. It was simply about learning about each other, learning about compromise and learning HOW to fight. It took some time. You can make it work through it all if you just have the attitude of lifelong commitment and try really hard to learn how to argue fairly. Arguments are normal and can be really healthy if you learn how to do it right. Good luck to you. Congrats on your marriage and your new baby.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:03 AM on Feb. 1, 2009

  • DH and i lived together for 3 years before we got married, we went through a phase where we had spats allt he time, its an adjustment period, getting used to each others quirks. you have alot happening at one time life witha baby is a huge change as well.

    It is very normal to have small fights in the beggining, it will take time but you will get used to each other routine and things will be fine.


    Answer by 3_ring_circus_ at 12:11 AM on Feb. 1, 2009

  • I agree...I have been married for almost 4 and a half years with a step-daughter and now my own child (15 months). I got married when i was 16! If I can do it than i believe you can! Just remember everyone has their spats there is usually something wrong if you don't. Marriage is like wine, it gets better with time!" Ok not always but if it's meant to be then it will be but you can't give up...

    Answer by Keatons_mom07 at 12:18 AM on Feb. 1, 2009

  • That is natural, you are still getting to know eachother. It will pass.

    Answer by pnwmom at 1:02 AM on Feb. 1, 2009

  • You have a lot going on. My hubby and I lived together for 6 months before he was deployed to Iraq. When he came home we had two new babies and 4 y/o that was just 2 when he left so, the 4 y/o was getting ready to start school. You have a lot of major changes in just short period of time, it will take some time to get used to. Go to counseling if you think you need it. It is very stressful on a military person to come home from war and immediately become daddy and hubby, just give it some time. Good Luck.

    Answer by matthewscandi at 9:22 AM on Feb. 1, 2009

  • its normal. Especially if ure baby crys all the time. Write him a letter, let him know how u feel. When i put my thought on paper, my boyfirend could always understand me better.

    Answer by Serenityc21 at 10:48 PM on Feb. 1, 2009