Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

Dear single mothers of CM

Do you agree with this statement?

"I believe that the best situation for a child is to be raised by both a male and female."

 

Is your child suffering needlessly because you did not marry or stay married to their biological father(s)?  Would the be better off today if you were married to them, regardless of any fidelity, addiction or abuse issues they might have?

Answer Question
 
NotPanicking

Asked by NotPanicking at 2:32 PM on Jun. 28, 2012 in Parenting Debate

Level 51 (420,250 Credits)
Answers (27)
  • I've been both, so I feel that qualifies me to respond.

    No, I do not agree. That statement is BS.
    m-avi

    Answer by m-avi at 2:33 PM on Jun. 28, 2012

  • Nope, not at all. Not all guys are cut out to be dads and not all women are cut out to be moms. Some kids are better off with one or the other. My son is mostly with me, though he does see his dad. I do all the raising though and that includes being the one to teach him to throw a ball and ride a bike and even to pee standing up. (that was not fun) His dad loves him, just isn't that involved for the most part. DS spends 70% of the time he is at his dad's with his Granny. I know kids that don't have a father in their life at all and they are doing just fine!
    kmath

    Answer by kmath at 2:35 PM on Jun. 28, 2012

  • I've been both and no I don't agree
    Mrs_Harsh

    Answer by Mrs_Harsh at 2:35 PM on Jun. 28, 2012

  • i'm not a single mother but i think the statment is crap. i think ifthe child is raised by a loving family (single mom, single dad, gay couple, straight couple, married, not married) then that's all that matters
    josiesmommy00

    Answer by josiesmommy00 at 2:36 PM on Jun. 28, 2012

  • Is your child suffering needlessly because...married to their biological father

    Sure is- they would have been doing so much better to be raised by an alcoholic who sees nothing wrong with child sexual assault and thought I would look better with bruises.
    Silly fucking me!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:38 PM on Jun. 28, 2012

  • Had I stayed with my ex, they would have been raised to see and hear us fighting, mainly over him screwing someone else. They would have seen him bring other women into our home when I wasn't home and be expected to keep it a secret from me. How exactly would that have been better for them?

    That statement is such a load of crap.
    wendythewriter

    Answer by wendythewriter at 2:43 PM on Jun. 28, 2012

  • NO
    LostSoul88

    Answer by LostSoul88 at 2:52 PM on Jun. 28, 2012

  • I have never been a single mother.
    I do not think a child benefites from abusive parents (either gender)
    However
    Children need interaction with both a female figure and a male figure. It does not need to be a husband.
    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 3:18 PM on Jun. 28, 2012

  • I believe a child needs both, but I don't judge. I know some have parents in jail (both or just one), the dad or mother died (sad), or things just didn't work out. Life may or may not be harder for a child raised in a one parent home, but who is to say? I know many children from a home with both parents and they still had it rough.
    Nikkijr

    Answer by Nikkijr at 3:38 PM on Jun. 28, 2012

  • Not a single parent but props to those who are. I find children need people in their lives who nurture and support them. It can be two female parents, two male parents, a heterosexual couple, divorced parents, grandparents, foster parents....but above all a person who cares. The gender is a non issue for me.
    frogdawg

    Answer by frogdawg at 4:07 PM on Jun. 28, 2012

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN